<script>
  <scene>
    <character>WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS</character>
    <dialogue>Written by</dialogue>
    <scene_description>Jemaine Clement & Taika Waititi Final Script Defender Films Ltd. ABBREVIATIONS USED: V/O Voice over OFF Off Camera ON On Camera WS Wide shot LS Long shot MWS Medium wide shot M2S Medium two shot MS Medium shot MCU Medium close up CU Close up ECU Extreme close up O/S Over shoulder H/A High Angle L/A Low Angle FG Foreground BG Background BLACK.: OPENING TITLES ANIMATED LOGO: UNISON BLACK.: ANIMATED LOGO: THE NEW ZEALAND DOCUMENTARY BOARD BLACK.: FADE IN TITLE: Every few years a secret society in New Zealand gathers for a special event: THE UNHOLY MASQUERADE BLACK.: FADE IN TITLE: In the months leading up to the ball, a documentary crew was granted full access to a small group of this society. BLACK.: CU DIGITAL DISPLAY ON CLOCK: 5:59. IT FLICKS TO 6:00.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. VIAGO'S BEDROOM/ENTRANCE HALL - NIGHT. VIAGO WAKES UP</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO'S COFFIN IN BEDROOM. CLOCK ON TABLE. COFFIN OPENS AND VIAGO'S HAND REACHES OUT AND TURNS OFF CLOCK. BLACK.: FADE IN TITLE: Each crew member wore a crucifix and was granted protection by the subjects of the film. BLACK.: WS VIAGO IN COFFIN. PAN AND TILT UP AS HE RISES UP OUT OF COFFIN TO MS. ZOOM IN TO MCU. FADE IN TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Viago FADE IN TITLE \[SUPERED\]: 379 years old MWS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] TURNING ON LAMP. MS VIAGO. TRACK BACK AS HE WALKS TO CURTAIN. VIAGO \[V/O\]: So, it's PM in the night-time, which is when I wake up. VIAGO: This is always a really scary part for me. MS VIAGO. HE PEERS THROUGH CURTAIN. MS VIAGO PEERING THROUGH CURTAIN. HE TURNS TO CAMERA. VIAGO: Yes! Night-time. MCU VIAGO. PAN AND TRACK IN TO WS AS VIAGO WALKS THROUGH DOORWAY INTO ENTRANCE HALL. TILT UP AS HE CLIMBS STAIRS.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>So, now I'm going to wake up my flatmates.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I really love living in a flatting situation.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Wake up! Wake up everyone! VIAGO \[V/O\]: I like to hang out with other vampires. I like the company... VIAGO: Awaken! Awakey wakey!</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT/INT. DEACON'S CLOSET - NIGHT. VIAGO WAKES DEACON</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] KNOCKING ON DOOR. HE OPENS DOOR TO REVEAL DEACON HANGING UPSIDE DOWN. VIAGO \[V/O\]: I just really like having a good time with my friends. VIAGO: Deacon... hi. Hey Deacon.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: How was your night last night? MCU DEACON HANGING UPSIDE DOWN. VIAGO IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. ZOOM OUT TO O/S DEACON \[UPSIDE DOWN\], VIAGO IN LEFT FG. DEACON: I transformed into a dog and had sex. VIAGO: Cool. We're gonna have a little flat meeting in the kitchen in about fifteen minutes, okay? O/S DEACON \[UPSIDE DOWN\], VIAGO IN LEFT FG. ZOOM IN TO MCU DEACON HANGING UPSIDE DOWN.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Okay. Shall I close this?</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT/INT. VLADISLAV'S BEDROOM - NIGHT. VIAGO WAKES VLADISLAV</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO. PAN AS HE WALKS TO DOOR. HE OPENS IT TO REVEAL VLADISLAV ON BED WITH TWO WOMEN. VIAGO QUICKLY CLOSES DOOR AND TURNS TO CU. VLADISLAV OPENS DOOR TO O/S VLADISLAV, VIAGO IN LEFT FG.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Vladislav!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WOMEN: (OFF) \[Moan, hiss et cetera\].</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <parenthetical>(Hiss)</parenthetical>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Sorry. Sorry.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>What?</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Hey.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: What time is it? O/S VLADISLAV, VIAGO IN LEFT FG, AT DOOR. VLADISLAV CLOSES DOOR. PAN AS VIAGO WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. HE TURNS TO CAMERA, THEN STARTS TO EXIT RIGHT OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Um, we're going to have a flat meeting in about ten minutes.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Twenty.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay. Is there...</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT/INT. PETYR'S BEDROOM - NIGHT. VIAGO WAKES PETYR</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>H/A MS VIAGO PUTTING CHICKEN IN SACK. H/A MS VIAGO OPENING HATCH DOOR. H/A MWS VIAGO DESCENDING STAIRS TO PETYR'S BEDROOM.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>So um, we're in Petyr's room. I'm just going to wake him up.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO. MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] OPENING PETYR'S COFFIN TO REVEAL PETYR ASLEEP STANDING UP.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>O/S PETYR ASLEEP STANDING UP, VIAGO IN LEFT FG.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Petyr...</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Petyr...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>O/S PETYR ASLEEP STANDING UP, VIAGO IN LEFT FG. PETYR WAKES. TRACK BACK. VIAGO: Petyr, wake up.</scene_description>
    <character>PETYR:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Gasps\].</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Gasps\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Hey listen, we're just having a flat meeting upstairs in about ten minutes. You don't have to come, but I thought I'd extend an invitation to you just in case. Um, there's a lot of stuff on the floor down here, Petyr. And - like this - it seems - I don't - oh, it's a spinal column. Yuk. M2S VIAGO AND PETYR \[IN COFFIN\]. MS VIAGO LOOKING AT FLOOR. TILT DOWN TO CU SKELETON ON FLOOR. VIAGO: And I was thinking maybe I should just bring a broom down here for you, if you wanted to sweep up some of the skeletons. I don't know, you know, maybe... M2S VIAGO AND PETYR \[IN COFFIN\]. TRACK BACK.</scene_description>
    <character>PETYR:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO PICKING UP SACK. TILT UP. VIAGO: \[Grunts\]. Okay, I got you this chicken. MS VIAGO \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] PASSING SACK INTO PETYR \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN COFFIN. PAN AND TILT TO MS VIAGO CLOSING COFFIN.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. FLAT MEETING</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE. VIAGO ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME AND SITS.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sighs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: Is Petyr coming? Should we wait? ZOOM IN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE. PAN TO M2S DEACON AND VIAGO. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Petyr is eight thousand years old. We're not going to have Petyr at the meeting. Okay, so, I wanted to have a quick chat about flat responsibilities, because, ah, guys I think that we're not all pulling our weight here. We're not just pointing the finger at you, Deacon. You are a cool guy, but you're not pulling your weight in the flat. CU PAPERS IN VIAGO'S HANDS. MCU VLADISLAV. MCU DEACON. ZOOM OUT YO M2S DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. M2S DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. ZOOM IN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. DEACON: Oh, I'm glad to hear that I'm cool \[laughs\]. VLADISLAV: No, that's not the point though. You missed it. VIAGO \[OFF\]: Yeah. DEACON: No, I know. I know. VIAGO \[OFF\]: It's not a flat meeting about how cool you are, it's... DEACON: I do my flat chores. MCU VIAGO. PAN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: No, you don't. VIAGO \[OFF\]: No, you don't. This is why we're having this flat meeting.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes, I do.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. ZOOM IN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. VLADISLAV: The point is, Deacon, that you have not done the dishes for five years. M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. ZOOM OUT TO MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Vladislav is right. It's unacceptable to have so many bloody dishes all over this bench like that. CU BLOODY DISHES ON BENCH PAN.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I'm so embarrassed when people come over here.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. M2S DEACON AND VIAGO. VLADISLAV IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. DEACON: What does it matter? You bring them over, you kill them. VIAGO: He's right. MCU VLADISLAV.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: Vampires don't do dishes. M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. VIAGO \[V/O\]: Deacon is like the rebellious young vampire. He's always doing crazy things, saying crazy things. He's just like the young bad boy of the group.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON CITY - NIGHT. DEACON BEING REBELLIOUS</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS DEACON JUMPING OVER BOLLARDS. VIAGO AND VLADISLAV WATCH. OTHERS IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PEOPLE ON STREET: \[General chatter, laughter\]. WS DEACON RUBBING HIMSELF AGAINST PHOTOGRAPH OF WOMAN IN SHOP WINDOW. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TOWARDS DEACON. OTHERS IN BG. PAN. WS DEACON KISSING PHOTOGRAPH OF WOMAN IN SHOP WINDOW. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO IN FG. DEACON TURNS TO CU. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sniffs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON INTERVIEW MS DEACON. FADE IN TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Deacon FADE IN TITLE \[SUPERED\]: 183 years old</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[ON, V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay so... one day I was... selling my wares, and I walked past this old creepy castle, and I look at it and think...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF DEACON CARRYING BOXES ON HIS BACK. ZOOM OUT. CU BLACK AND WHITE PAINTING OF CASTLE. ZOOM IN. MS DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[ON, V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>...very old and creepy. And then this creature flies at me. It dragged me back to this dark dungeon... and bit into my neck.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU PAINTING OF CASTLE. ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF BATS. TILT UP. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF MAN AND VAMPIRE. ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF MAN MANACLED IN DUNGEON. ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF MAN. ZOOM OUT. DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: And just at the point of death, this creature forced me to suck its foul blood. And then, it opened its wings like this, and hovered above me screeching \[screeches and laughs\]. "Now you are vampire." CU PAINTING OF MAN SUCKING BLOOD. ZOOM IN. MCU DEACON. DEACON: And it was Petyr. MWS DEACON AND PETYR SEATED. DEACON: And we're still friends today. VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]: Vlad, you were great. You put out the recycling, which was really cool.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. FLAT MEETING - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO. PAN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: And the other day I dragged a man's body down the hallway, and noticed that there was no dust. Ah... VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: like, I kind of - I kind of swept the hallway. VIAGO \[V/O\]: Vladislav is just like this older vampire who grew up in the mediaeval times and, you know, to be living this long, and to have seen the things that he's seen... and still like, kind of, have it together...</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT. VLADISLAV HITS VIAGO WITH ARROW</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS VLADISLAV WITH BOW AND ARROW. ZOOM IN AND PAN AROUND TO LS VIAGO HOLDING DART BOARD, VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. VLADISLAV FIRES ARROW, IT HIS VIAGO. ZOOM IN AS VIAGO FALLS. VIAGO: \[Screams\]. LS VIAGO ON FLOOR WITH ARROW IN HIS LEG. VIAGO \[V/O\]: ...I mean, hats off to him. VIAGO: Bloody hell! VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: Sorry. VIAGO \[V/O\]: He's a really great guy, a bit of a pervert. He has some pretty old ideas about things. LS VIAGO ON FLOOR WITH ARROW IN HIS LEG. PAN AROUND TO MCU VLADISLAV. CU VLADISLAV. HE AIMS ARROW.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. FLAT MEETING - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO. PAN AND ZOOM OUT TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. PAN TO M2S DEACON AND VIAGO. VIAGO: We need to do the... VLADISLAV: But we should get some slaves. DEACON: Yes. Let's get some slaves. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: When I first became a vampire, I was quite tyrannical. I was known for, ah, torturing a lot of people. VLADISLAV INTERVIEW CU VLADISLAV. FADE IN TITLE SUPERED\]: Vladislav FADE IN TITLE \[SUPERED\]: 862 years old PAN TO CU PAINTING OF VLADISLAV. WS VLADISLAV IN TORTURE CHAMBER. VLADISLAV: This is my torture chamber.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I don't come in here often anymore. I tended to torture when I was in a bad place.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU HOOKS IN TORTURE CHAMBER. CU CHAIR IN TORTURE CHAMBER. MCU VLADISLAV IN TORTURE CHAMBER. VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: My thing was I would poke someone with implements. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VAMPIRE, WOMAN AND CHILDREN. PAN AND TILT. DISSOLVE. CU PAINTING OF VAMPIRE ON HORSE. ZOOM IN. MCU VLADISLAV VLADISLAV: I was known as Vladislav the Poker.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. FLAT MEETING - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] AT CHORE CHART. VIAGO: It's been like this the whole time, okay? So, let's start with vacuuming and dusting. You did that. DEACON \[V/O\]: Viago is a little... pedantic. MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] AT CHORE CHART.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>The washing and the rubbish, I did that. Deacon, on dishes, and it still hasn't moved in five years.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV INTERVIEW MS VLADISLAV.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>He was an 18th Century dandy. So he can be very fussy.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU PAINTING OF VIAGO AS DANDY. ZOOM IN. DEACON INTERVIEW MS DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>He nags and nags.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>...went in the lounge the other</dialogue>
    <scene_description>day, and there was blood all over my nice antique couch.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. FLAT MEETING - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>PROFILE CU VIAGO. DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Which one, the red one?</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Well, it's red now, yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VLADISLAV. VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]: If you're going to eat a victim on my nice clean couch, put down some newspaper on the floor, and some towels. It's not hard to do. M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. PAN TO M2S DEACON AND VIAGO. VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: We are vampires, we don't put down towels. MS VIAGO. PAN AND ZOOM OUT TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. PAN TO M2S DEACON AND VIAGO. PAN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Some vampires do. VLADISLAV: Well, not serious ones. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: When you get four vampires in a flat, obviously there's going to be a lot of tension. O/S DEACON, VIAGO IN RIGHT FG. VLADISLAV INTERVIEW MCU VLADISLAV. VLADISLAV: There's tension in any, any flatting situation. VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]: It's settled then. We'll all do our jobs. Starting with a certain Deacon on...</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. FLAT MEETING - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. ZOOM IN AND TILT UP AS DEACON AND VIAGO FLY UP TO CEILING. DEACON: I will do my dishes! \[Hisses\]. VIAGO: Good. Then do them \[hisses\]. MCU DEACON. VIAGO IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. MWS DEACON AND VIAGO IN MID-AIR. VLADISLAV IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. TILT DOWN AS DEACON AND VIAGO LAND ON GROUND. PAN TO M2S AS DEACON SITS AT TABLE. VIAGO EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME. PAN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. DEACON DOING THE DISHES</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CU DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] DOING DISHES. MCU DEACON. DEACON: This is bullshit. MWS DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\] DOING DISHES. OPENING TITLE MONTAGE SEQUENCE TITLE: Unison Films Presents CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF BATS. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF BAT. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF BAT. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF BAT. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF BAT. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF BAT. TITLE: a Defender films Production WS VLADISLAV'S LEGS IN MID-AIR VACUUMING. WS VLADISLAV IN MID-AIR VACUUMING. TITLE: In association with Park Road Post Production CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF TOOTH. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF TEETH. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF TEETH. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF COFFINS. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF COFFIN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VAMPIRE. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF SKELETON AND MEN. M2S VIAGO BRUSHING PETYR'S TEETH. TITLE: And The New Zealand Documentary Board CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR SEATED IN FRONT OF ORGAN. ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF DEACON AND COSSACKS. ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF VIAGO AND MUSICIANS. ZOOM IN. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV. ZOOM IN. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR. ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VIAGO. ZOOM IN. CU PAINTING OF DEACON. ZOOM IN. CU PAINTING OF VLADISLAV. TEXT: FIG II. VLADISLAV THE POKER VLADISLAV INTERVIEW MCU VLADISLAV HOLDING STICK. ZOOM OUT. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: I, ah, became a vampire when I was sixteen, and that is why I always look sixteen. WS VLADISLAV SEATED BESIDE COFFIN. MCU VLADISLAV. ZOOM IN. VLADISLAV: In those days, of course, life was tough for a sixteen-year-old. CU PAINTING OF VLADISLAV. TILT UP AND ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VLADISLAV POKING MAN. OTHERS IN BG. ZOOM IN. PAN TO MAN BEING POKED. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VLADISLAV AND PAULINE. ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF MEN WITH SPEARS. PAN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VAMPIRE AND PEOPLE. CU PAINTING OF BATTLE ON SHIP. TILT DOWN. VIAGO INTERVIEW ECU PAINTING OF VIAGO. VIAGO \[V/O\]: Vampires have had a pretty bad rap. CU VIAGO'S FOOT ON POTTERY WHEEL. WS VIAGO SEATED ON POTTERY WHEEL. VIAGO: We're not these mopey old creatures who live in castles, and - well some - most of us are - a lot are. But there are also those of us who like to flat together in really small countries like New Zealand. CU VIAGO'S HANDS MAKING POT ON POTTERY WHEEL. WS VIAGO SEATED ON POTTERY WHEEL. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VIAGO. ZOOM OUT. TEXT: KAISER VIAGO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VIAGO. ZOOM IN. WS PETYR. ZOOM IN. CU PAINTING OF PETYR BITING WOMAN. TILT DOWN. CU PAINTING OF PETYR. ZOOM OUT TO REVEAL JAPANESE MAN. CU PAINTING OF MEN ON HORSEBACK WITH BOWS AND ARROWS. TILT DOWN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VILLAGES. PAN. WS \[BLACK AND WHITE\] DEACON DANCING. CU \[BLACK AND WHITE\] DEACON. MCU \[BLACK AND WHITE\] DEACON. MCU \[BLACK AND WHITE\] DEACON. DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: I was a Nazi... vampire. DEACON INTERVIEW MWS DEACON SEATED. CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF DEACON AND NAZI VAMPIRES. ZOOM IN. ADOLF HITLER \[V/O\]: \[In German\]: ...and with my secret Vampire Army, we will conquer the world! WS \[BLACK AND WHITE\] DEACON HOVERING OVER CHILD ON BED. DOCTORS, NAZI AND CHILDREN IN BG. MCU NAZI VAMPIRE. PAN. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: ...and with my secret Vampire Army... L/A MCU ADOLF HITLER. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: ...we will conquer the world! WS NAZI PARLIAMENT. NAZIS: \[Cheer et cetera\]. DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: After the war, which the Nazis lost... MWS DEACON SEATED. DEACON: I don't know if you know that the Nazis lost that war. If you were a Nazi after the war... H/A MS \[BLACK AND WHITE\] DEACON ON GROUND. SOLDIER \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] WITH CRUCIFIX IN FG. DEACON \[V/O\]: ...and if you were a vampire... MWS DEACON SEATED. DEACON: ...and if you were a Nazi vampire... no way. CU DEACON'S PASSPORT. TEXT: PASSPORT DEACON \[V/O\]: I Was out of there. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF SHIP. TRANSITION TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF BOAT. ZOOM OUT TO WS CUSTOM HOUSE QUAY. TEXT: CUSTOM HOUSE QUAY, WELLINGTON NZ. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR ON SHIP. ZOOM IN. MONTAGE SEQUENCE WS HOUSE. ZOOM OUT. CU NEWSPAPER. ZOOM IN. TEXT: YOUNG MAN DISAPPEARS. WELLINGTON, JULY 19. CU NEWSPAPER ARTICLE. TEXT: CORPSE CU PAN NEWSPAPER ARTICLE. CU NEWSPAPER ARTICLE. TEXT: UNBURIED CU INVITATION. ZOOM IN. TEXT: THE UNDEAD SOCIETY OF WELLINGTON BIDES YOU TO ATTEND THE UNHOLY MASQUERADE FROM FRIDAY EVENING AUGUST 13th 1897. TILT DOWN TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF DANCERS. TILT UP TO UNHOLY MASQUERADE INVITATION. ZOOM IN. TEXT: DECEMBER 31, 1920 CU \[BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF VIAGO, DEACON, VLADISLAV AND PETYR HOLDING NUMBERS 1946. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR, DEACON AND VIAGO, AND PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR IN COSTUME. CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV AND OTHERS DANCING. ZOOM IN. ZOOM OUT TO CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO UNDER HAPPY 320th BIRTHDAY" BANNER. ZOOM OUT TO CU CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV AND DEACON BESIDE CAR. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV, PETYR, DEACON AND VIAGO HOLDING ZOOM OUT TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VIAGO \[IN MID-AIR\] AND DEACON BESIDE POOL TABLE. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF BAT. TEXT: DEACON 1978 ZOOM OUT TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF DEACON, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV. ZOOM OUT TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VIAGO USING SODA STREAM. DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] AND VLADISLAV IN BG. TRANSITION TO PHOTOGRAPH OF VIAGO AND DEACON WITH SODA STREAM BOTTLES. VLADISLAV \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. ZOOM IN. TRANSITION TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV BESIDE HIS PORTRAIT. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR AND BALLOONS. PAN AND TILT TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV, PETYR IN BG. PAN AND TILT TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR AND DEACON PLAYING CHESS. ZOOM OUT TO CU PHOTOGRAPH OF DEACON WEARING 2002 GLASSES. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF DEACON AND VIAGO. ZOOM IN. BLACK.: FADE IN CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV, DEACON, PETYR AND VIAGO. FADE TO BLACK.: BLACK.: GRAPHIC: WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS BLACK.: VIAGO INTERVIEW MWS VIAGO SEATED AT DESK.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[ON, V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Ja, I came to this country for love. Ah, there was a girl, human girl, and I thought she was fantastic. She was absolutely amazing. I was smitten. Her family emigrated to New Zealand, and I thought, you know what? To hell with it. I'm going to go. I'm going to chase her and tell her how I feel. I told my servant, Phillip, send me to New Zealand. He put the wrong postage on my coffin, so the whole journey took about 18 months.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU PHOTOGRAPH OF YOUNG KATHERINE. MCU VIAGO. WS VIAGO SEATED AT DESK. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF SHIP. CU MAP OF THE WORLD. PAN AND TILT AND ZOOM IN TO NEW ZEALAND. WS VIAGO SEATED AT DESK.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>And when I got here she had found someone else.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>She had fallen in love. And... she was married.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO SEATED AT DESK. HE PUTS CLOTH ON TABLE. MWS VIAGO PUTTING ON GLOVES. WS VIAGO SEATED AT DESK. HE OPENS CLOTH. CU VIAGO'S HANDS OPENING HANDKERCHIEF TO REVEAL SILVER LOCKET.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>She gave me this before she left.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VIAGO HOLDING UP SILVER LOCKET. CU PHOTOGRAPHS OF YOUNG KATHERINE AND VIAGO IN LOCKET, IN VIAGO'S HANDS.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>There she is. That's me - I put myself in there too. She told me it was pure silver.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VIAGO LOOKING AT LOCKET.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Unfortunately we vampires cannot wear silver.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO WEARING SILVER LOCKET. HIS CHEST STARTS TO SMOKE. VIAGO: \[Breathes heavily, blows.\] Yeah. MCU VIAGO TAKING OFF SILVER LOCKET. MWS VIAGO BLOWING ON HIS CHEST. VIAGO: That's about as long as I can wear that \[breathes heavily\].</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. ENTRANCE HALL - NIGHT. PLAYING MUSIC</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV PLAYING MUSIC. MS VIAGO PLAYING TRUMPET AND DEACON PLAYING DOUBLE BASS. CU STUFFED DEER. WS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV PLAYING MUSIC.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. ENTRANCE HALL - NIGHT. GETTING READY TO GO OUT</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS VLADISLAV. PAN TO MWS VIAGO AND DEACON \[SKETCHING\]. ZOOM IN AS DEACON HOLDS UP SKETCH. VLADISLAV: Tonight we are going out into Wellington central. It is important that we look good. VIAGO: Yeah, it's really good, yeah. Like it?</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>One of the unfortunate things about not having a reflection is that you... don't know exactly what you look like.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO DOING UP BUTTONS. VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]: \[Makes ghost noise\] Look, a ghost cup... floating all by itself. CU MIRROR. CUP STARTS TO FLOAT IN MID-AIR. ZOOM OUT TO MCU VIAGO BESIDE MIRROR HOLDING CUP. M2S VLADISLAV \[HOLDING UP SKETCH\] AND VIAGO. VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: We can give each other feedback and help each other out, until we're looking great. CU PILE OF SKETCHES. CU SKETCH OF DEACON. MWS VLADISLAV \[WEARING BLOODY SHIRT\] AND DEACON. VIAGO \[V/O\]: Yeah, some of our clothes are from victims.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Here.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO INTERVIEW MS VIAGO SEATED. VIAGO: You might bite someone and then, you think, ooh, those are some nice pants.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. ENTRANCE HALL - NIGHT. GETTING READY TO GO OUT -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED MWS VIAGO IN CAMOUFLAGE PANTS. DEACON AND VLADISLAV IN FG. VIAGO: I should wears these. VLADISLAV: No. Change it.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>When you're a vampire you become very sexy.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON INTERVIEW MWS DEACON SEATED. VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: We are trying to attract victims to us.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. ENTRANCE HALL - NIGHT. GETTING READY TO GO OUT -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED MWS DEACON AND VIAGO WALKING CLOTHES DOWN HALLWAY. WS DEACON AND VIAGO SHOWING CLOTHES TO VLADISLAV. VLADISLAV: Not sure about the waistcoat. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: I go for a look which I call dead but delicious. MWS VLADISLAV. VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: We are the bait, but we are also the trap. WS DEACON AND VIAGO SHOWING CLOTHES TO VLADISLAV. M2S DEACON AND VLADISLAV. PAN TO MS VIAGO. VIAGO: Hello ladies \[laughs\]. MS DEACON IN FUR COAT. WS DEACON WEARING SKULL ON BELT. MS VLADISLAV IN BLOODY SHIRT. MS DEACON IN FUR COAT. MS VLADISLAV IN TOP HAT. MS VIAGO POSING. WS VIAGO IN COAT. WS VIAGO IN LONG COAT. WS VIAGO IN ANIMAL PRINT COAT. WS VIAGO POSING. WS DEACON IN SKI SUIT. WS VLADISLAV POSING. MS DEACON IN SKI SUIT. MS VLADISLAV PUTTING ON TOP HAT. MS VIAGO WITH LARGE BOW TIE. MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV. MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV. VIAGO: And voila, we are ready to go into town and party... WS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV. VLADISLAV AND DEACON: Vampire style. VIAGO: Vampire style.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. BUS - NIGHT. TRAVELLING TO TOWN</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV ON BUS. PASSENGERS IN FG.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON CITY - NIGHT. OUT ON THE TOWN</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV WALKING DOWN STREET. TRAFFIC IN FG. DEACON \[V/O\]: When we go into town, we must try to blend in. WS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO WALKING. OTHERS IN FG. PAN. MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TRACK IN. DEACON: Just walking the streets. MWS DEACON, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV WALKING DOWN STREET. TRACK BACK. PAN TO YOUTH. PAN BACK TO DEACON, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV. VIAGO: Coming into town, um, is really cool, because just for one brief moment, I feel... YOUTH \[OFF\]: Homos! MS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO WALKING. PAN AND TRACK IN. WS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] DOWN STREET. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: The trouble with being a vampire is you have to be invited in - to go in. MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN AND PAN TO MS VLADISLAV. WS VIAGO, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND BOUNCERS. OTHERS IN BG AND FG. DEACON: We'd like to come into the bar, please. WS VIAGO, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND BOUNCER. DEACON: Can you invite us into the bar, please? BOUNCER: Five dollars, you can walk in. VLADISLAV: Will you invite us in? DEACON: Could you just... MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN. VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: If the humans found out what we were, they would destroy us. CAR CLEARS FG TO MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV CROSSING ROAD \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. OTHERS IN BG. VIAGO \[V/O\]: There are between sixty and seventy vampires in the Greater Wellington region. MWS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\] WALK PAST VAMPIRE AND MAN SEATED ON BENCH. PAN. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. PAN TO VAMPIRE IN PHONE BOX. VLADISLAV: Obvious vampire.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Julie...</dialogue>
    <character>MORANA \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Hello.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S VICTIM AND MORANA. TRACK BACK AS SHE TURNS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TO REVEAL VIAGO IN LEFT FG. MORANA: How embarrassing.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <character>MORANA \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>He's, um, a guy I used to work with when I was human...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VIAGO, VICTIM, MORANA, VLADISLAV AND DEACON. DEACON EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>He looks gone.</dialogue>
    <character>MORANA:</character>
    <dialogue>...before when I was human. Yeah, he's gone. I've been draining him all night \[laughs\]. I've been a very thirsty girl \[laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VLADISLAV AND CHILD VAMPIRES ON STREET. DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. OTHERS IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Hey guys.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Being bitten as a little boy or a little girl, you're always going to look the same age.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV AND CHILD VAMPIRES. MCU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>What are you doing tonight? Are you going to kill some perverts?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S CHILD VAMPIRES. PAN TO MCU VLADISLAV. DEACON IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>CHILD VAMPIRE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, we're meeting a pedophile.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Cool.</dialogue>
    <character>CHILD VAMPIRE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO, DEACON, VLADISLAV AND BOUNCER. VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV START TO CROSS ROAD. VIAGO: Okay. Let's just go to Big Kumara. BOUNCER: Have a good night, guys. VIAGO: Yeah. You too. Bye. DEACON: You have a good night.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>You too.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: Big Kumara is vampire owned and operated. And so we can always get in. MCU VLADISLAV. PAN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. VIAGO ENTER RIGHT FG IN BG. WS "THE BIG KUMARA" SIGN ON BUILDING. ZOOM IN. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: It's the hottest nightspot for vampires in Wellington. MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND DEACON.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. THE BIG KUMARA - NIGHT. ARRIVING AT BIG KUMARA</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS BOUNCER. DEACON, VLADISLAV AND VIAGO CROSS FG AND STARTS TO CLIMB STAIRS. BIG KUMARA BOUNCER: Come on in, guys. Come on in. VIAGO: Thank you. Thanks.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Thank you.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO DANCING IN BAR. OTHERS AT TABLE IN BG.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. THE BIG KUMARA - NIGHT. DEACON INSTRUCTS JACKIE TO BRING</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>HIM SOME VIRGINS WS JACKIE IN THROUGH BAR. ZOOM IN TO MWS. DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: Perhaps you could bring some people to the house. MCU DEACON SEATED. PAN TO MCU JACKIE.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Sure.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[OFF\]: Perhaps some virgins. MCU DEACON. JACKIE IN LEFT FG. TILT DOWN AS SHE WRITES. JACKIE \[ON/OFF\]: Virgins. Yep, okay. Any kind of preference, in terms of gender or... O/S DEACON, JACKIE IN RIGHT FG. ZOOM OUT. DEACON: Maybe some ladies. JACKIE \[OFF\]: Yep, ladies. DEACON: Perhaps a guy. JACKIE: One of each? DEACON: One of each would be cool. M2S JACKIE AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE. JACKIE \[V/O\]: My relationship with Deacon is... JACKIE INTERVIEW MCU JACKIE DRIVING. FADE IN TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Jackie FADE IN TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Human JACKIE: ...well, I'm his familiar. He's my master. WS JACKIE MOWING LAWN. JACKIE: He tells me what to do; I do it. WS JACKIE STARTING LEAF BLOWER. JACKIE \[V/O\]: We have that kind of master/servant relationship, which works nicely actually. WS JACKIE WITH LEAF BLOWER.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. DRY CLEANER'S - DAY. JACKIE DROPS OFF DEACON'S LAUNDRY</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS JACKIE \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] CARRYING BAG OF LAUNDRY. IT AS SHE WALKS TOWARDS COUNTER. DRY CLEANER IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Hello.</dialogue>
    <character>DRY CLEANER \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Hello.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>JACKIE \[V/O, ON\]: Oh, it's a little bit of blood. Um, my husband, he's - he's a hemophiliac. O/S JACKIE \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] HOLDING BLOODY SHIRT. DRY CLEANER IN RIGHT FG.</scene_description>
    <character>DRY CLEANER:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>O/S JACKIE, DRY CLEANER IN RIGHT FG.</scene_description>
    <character>DRY CLEANER:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh, okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>JACKIE: You know, someone that bleeds a lot.</scene_description>
    <character>DRY CLEANER:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. THE BIG KUMARA - NIGHT. DEACON INSTRUCTS JACKIE -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED CU JACKIE'S NOTE PAD. TEXT: "...VIRGINS, LADIES, 1 X GUY, 1 X LADY" JACKIE \[OFF\]: Any kind of age range?</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Young.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>O/S DEACON, JACKIE IN RIGHT FG. ZOOM IN. JACKIE \[OFF\]: But not - not kids?</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Not kids.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>JACKIE \[OFF/ON\]: Eighteen to thirty? M2S JACKIE AND DEACON. PAN. DEACON: Definitely younger than yourself. JACKIE: Okay. So, eighteen to thirty. So it's a dinner party. M2S JACKIE AND DEACON. ZOOM IN TO MCU JACKIE. DEACON: Great. JACKIE: I'll be there. You'll be there. DEACON: Yes, dinner party. JACKIE: The guys will be there. We'll all be there. DEACON: Yes, we will dress up. JACKIE: Okay. Great. DEACON: ...and then... eat them. JACKIE: Okay. DEACON: Should be fun. JACKIE: Great. M2S JACKIE AND DEACON. JACKIE: I was just wondering if we could talk about the, um... O/S DEACON, JACKIE IN RIGHT FG. DEACON: Do you know of a night dentist? Because I have this thing here. PROFILE CU JACKIE. PAN TO MCU DEACON. JACKIE \[OFF/ON\]: I was just wondering if we could talk about the - the - the deal? PROFILE CU JACKIE. PAN TO MCU DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Hmm?</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>The deal?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: The dishes? JACKIE: Ah, no. The, you know, the deal. JACKIE \[V/O, ON\]: The deal is that he is going to give me eternal life, um, which is... very exciting. JACKIE INTERVIEW CU JACKIE DRIVING.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. THE BIG KUMARA - NIGHT. DEACON INSTRUCTS JACKIE -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED PROFILE CU JACKIE. DEACON IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. JACKIE \[ON/OFF\]: Well, I just feel like I've, kind of, reached my potential. And I wouldn't want to, kind of, get any older before, kind of... I just feel I'm the best version of myself that I can be. It's just that it's been four and a half years, and I just - I just... But it's doing your - your... I'm doing your pot plants, I'm doing your dry cleaning, I'm now doing your - your dishes, and I'm doing... You know, I'm just wondering... O/S DEACON, JACKIE IN RIGHT FG. DEACON: Yes. CU JACKIE. DEACON IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. O/S DEACON, JACKIE IN RIGHT FG. DEACON: Yeah. CU JACKIE. PAN TO MCU DEACON. ZOOM IN TO CU DEACON. DEACON: Ah... and the dentist. JACKIE \[OFF\]: And the dentist - and it's just taking an awful long time. So I was just wondering if I... DEACON: The dentist. O/S DEACON, JACKIE IN RIGHT FG. JACKIE EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Be gone.</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[OFF\]: See you later. MWS JACKIE WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] THROUGH BAR. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS DEACON SEATED. ZOOM IN TO CU.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. ALLEYWAY - NIGHT. CHILD VAMPIRES ATTACK PEDOPHILE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS PEDOPHILE WALKING. CHILD VAMPIRE #2 WITH ROPE HIDING. CHILD VAMPIRE #1 WALKING TO PEDOPHILE. MWS CHILD VAMPIRE #1 AND PEDOPHILE. CHILD VAMPIRE #2 STRANGLES MAN WITH ROPE. THEY BITE HIM. VIAGO: One of the most unfortunate things about being a vampire is that... you have to drink human blood.</scene_description>
    <character>PAEDOPHILIA</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS CHILD VAMPIRES FEEDING ON DEAD PEDOPHILE IN ALLEYWAY.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. LOUNGE - NIGHT. VIAGO BITES VICTIM</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO'S VICTIM. PAN TO MWS VIAGO'S VICTIM AND VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] WITH ROSE. VIAGO: I like to make a real evening of it. VIAGO'S VICTIM: It's lovely. VIAGO \[V/O\]: Play some music, maybe give them some nice wine. It's their last moment alive. So why not make it a nice experience? MS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO PLACING CLOTH OVER LIGHT. ZOOM OUT AND PAN TO MWS VIAGO'S VICTIM SEATED ON COUCH.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO'S VICTIM:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO \[PLAYING MANDOLIN\] AND VIAGO'S VICTIM. MWS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO AND VIAGO'S VICTIM. HE PLACES TOWELS ON COUCH. ZOOM IN TO CU TOWELS. VIAGO: So... tell me what you do. What do you...? MWS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO AND VIAGO'S VICTIM. HE PLACES DOWN NEWSPAPER. TILT DOWN. VIAGO'S VICTIM: I'm thinking about going to uni actually. VIAGO: Oh, you are? Put that under there.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO'S VICTIM:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Oh, university, ja? MWS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO AND VIAGO'S VICTIM SEATED ON COUCH. ZOOM IN TO M2S. VIAGO'S VICTIM: Mmm. Yeah, but after that I'm going to travel. Yeah, really wanted to go overseas for ages. So I'm saving up, and I'm going to go to Spain, and Italy, London and \[sighs\]. Yeah. MWS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO AND VIAGO'S VICTIM SEATED ON COUCH. VIAGO: Okay. Excuse me. Just put that there.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO'S VICTIM:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO AND VIAGO'S VICTIM SEATED ON COUCH. VIAGO: Here we go. MWS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO AND VIAGO'S VICTIM. HE BITES HER NECK. BLOOD SPURTS FROM HER NECK.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO'S VICTIM:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\]. \[Gasps\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Shit! Shit! MS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] AND VIAGO'S VICTIM. ZOOM OUT. BLOOD SPURTS FROM HER NECK. ZOOM IN AS HE TRIES TO DRINK BLOOD. VIAGO: \[Splutters, gargles, drinks\]. WS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO SEATED. VIAGO'S VICTIM'S BODY ON FLOOR AT HIS FEET. ZOOM IN. VIAGO \[V/O\]: Well, that didn't go so great. Um, I hit the main artery. MCU VIAGO COVERED IN BLOOD. VIAGO: So, yeah. It's a real mess in there. Um... on the upside, I think she had a really good time. MWS VIAGO COVERED IN BLOOD.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON CITY - NIGHT. VLADISLAV LOOKS FOR VICTIM</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS CITY AT NIGHT. WS WOMAN SEATED \[BACK TO CAMERA\] ON COUCH. VLADISLAV IN RIGHT FG. PULL FOCUS TO CU VLADISLAV. PULL FOCUS TO WOMAN AS VLADISLAV TURNS TO HER. VLADISLAV: Ah, so it's quite late, and, ah, I've managed to find a woman up watching television. And, ah, she seems like she'd be a good victim. I'm just going to use hypnosis on her. See me... See me... WS WOMAN SEATED \[BACK TO CAMERA\] ON COUCH. VLADISLAV IN RIGHT FG. PULL FOCUS AS VLADISLAV TURNS TO CAMERA. HE TURNS BACK. VLADISLAV: She can't - she can't see me from that angle.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Vladislav used to be extremely</dialogue>
    <scene_description>powerful. He could hypnotise crowds of people. DEACON and VIAGO INTERVIEW ECU PAINTING OF VLADISLAV. TILT UP TO HIS EYES. WS \[BLACK AND WHITE\] CROWD OF PEOPLE. DEACON \[V/O\]: Great orgies. Twenty, thirty women. CU PAINTING OF ORGY. CU PAINTING OF ORGY. VIAGO \[V/O\]: He could turn into all sorts of animals. But now he never gets the faces right. CU PICTURE OF CREATURE IN BOOK. ZOOM IN. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF SNAKE WITH HEAD OF A MAN. CU PAINTING OF MEN BEING KILLED. DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: He would kill anybody - men, women, children. Burning everything. It was totally great. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF VAMPIRE WITH WOMAN ON HORSE. ZOOM OUT. MS MAN EATING BABY. ZOOM IN. MCU DEACON. MS VIAGO SEATED.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>But he suffered a humiliating defeat at the hands of his arch nemesis... The Beast.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU VIAGO. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF CREATURE. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF MAN RIDING CREATURE. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF CREATURE. CU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>And he's never been the same.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON CITY - NIGHT. VLADISLAV LOOKS FOR VICTIM</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS VLADISLAV LOOKING THROUGH WINDOW.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>See me...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] MAN SEATED ON COUCH. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>See me...</dialogue>
    <dialogue>See me...</dialogue>
    <dialogue>See me...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] MAN SEATED ON COUCH. MCU MAN OPENING DOOR. PAN AND TILT TO MCU VLADISLAV. MAN: Would you like to come inside? VLADISLAV: Mmm. Mmm... ECU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF CREATURE.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. HOUSE - NIGHT. ESTABLISHING SHOT</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>L/A MS GATES. TILT DOWN TO WS HOUSE.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. DINNER PARTY</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS WINDOW. PETYR CROSSES FRAME LEFT TO RIGHT. CU DEACON'S HAND OPENING DOOR. TILT UP TO MS JACKIE. DEACON IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. NICK AND JOSEPHINE IN BG. JACKIE GOES TO KISS DEACON, THEN EXITS LEFT OF FRAME. TRACK BACK AS NICK AND JOSEPHINE ENTER HOUSE. PAN TO M2S NICK AND JOSEPHINE. JACKIE AND DEACON IN BG. DEACON: Ah, Jackie. Welcome. JACKIE: \[Laughs\]. Hello.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Come in.</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>JACKIE \[OFF\]: This is Nick, ex - ex boyfriend. And Josephine. NICK: Nice house. JACKIE \[ON/OFF\]: And this is Deacon. My overseas friend from Europe. JACKIE \[V/O\]: Deacon and his friends need victims. MS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV PEERING AROUND DOORWAY. PAN AS THEY TURN \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TO LS AS DEACON, JACKIE AND NICK WALK DOWN HALLWAY. MWS DEACON, JACKIE, NICK AND JOSEPHINE WALKING INTO ROOM. VIAGO IN BG. VIAGO: Hi. Please come in. Welcome. JACKIE INTERVIEW MCU JACKIE DRIVING. JACKIE: They can't be people that... I actually invest in or like, because of course, they will become victims.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. GARDEN CENTRE - DAY. JACKIE ON PHONE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS JACKIE DIALLING PHONE. JACKIE \[V/O\]: Hi, Josephine? MWS JACKIE ON PHONE, PUSHING TROLLEY. TRACK BACK. JACKIE: No. I sat next to you in English. Remember? Um, ah, you used to call me the Jaxocist. MWS JACKIE ON PHONE, PUSHING TROLLEY. TRACK BACK. JACKIE: No, you did. No, you did. Yeah. No, you started that... Ah, you were the one that started calling me that, and then everyone - then it, kind of, caught on... yeah. MWS JACKIE ON PHONE, PUSHING TROLLEY. TRACK BACK. JACKIE: \[Laughs\] Okay, bye then \[laughs\]. Bye. She's in.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. DINING ROOM - NIGHT. DINNER PARTY - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS JOSEPHINE SEATED AT TABLE. MS NICK. VIAGO IN BG. ZOOM IN TO WS VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\], NICK, JOSEPHINE, JACKIE AND DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\] SEATED AT TABLE. VIAGO IN BG. VIAGO: Do you like that, Nick? NICK: Yep. It's choice. WS NICK, JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. VIAGO STANDING IN BG. VIAGO STARTS TO WALK. VIAGO: I will go and prepare dinner.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Please.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: Nick, are you a virgin at all? MWS JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. MWS NICK, JOSEPHINE AND JACKIE SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV AND DEACON IN EDGES OF FRAME IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Ah, what?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: He doesn't seem like - are you - are you a virgin? WS JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Ah, yes.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Um, no.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK, VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN BOTTOM OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>I knew it.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. JACKIE: You were a virgin when we were seeing each other. MS NICK, VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. NICK: Yeah, I was 12. DEACON \[OFF\]: You said he was a virgin. DEACON INTERVIEW MS DEACON SEATED. DEACON: I think we drink virgin blood because... it sounds cool.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. DINING ROOM - NIGHT. DINNER PARTY - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. PAN TO MS JOSEPHINE. JACKIE IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: I think of it like this... if you're going to eat a sandwich... you will just enjoy it more if you knew no one had fucked it. VLADISLAV INTERVIEW MCU VLADISLAV. DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: Let's concentrate on Josephine then. Are you a virgin?</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. DINING ROOM - NIGHT. DINNER PARTY - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS NICK, JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. JOSEPHINE: \[Clears throat\] I'm not, no. M2S JOSEPHINE AND JACKIE. JACKIE \[ON/OFF\]: Okay, I'm really sorry. Because I totally... pinned her as a virgin. MS DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. JACKIE \[OFF/ON\]: She looks like a virgin, she talks like a virgin... I mean... who would have sex with her? I wouldn't. WS NICK, JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>I would.</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO WALKING DOWN CORRIDOR WITH TWO CANS OF SPAGHETTI. TRACK BACK. MS JOSEPHINE. VIAGO \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] POURS TINNED SPAGHETTI ONTO PLATES. NICK IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. ZOOM OUT TO MWS NICK, VIAGO AND JOSEPHINE.</scene_description>
    <character>JOSEPHINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Mmm...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Two dinners. Two dinners. Yum. DEACON \[OFF\]: Nick... WS NICK, JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. DEACON: Do you like biz-ghetti? NICK \[ON/OFF\]: Ah, yep. Usually like it. But... be better if it was warm. MS DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. MWS NICK, JOSEPHINE AND JACKIE SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME, AND DEACON IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME IN FG. DEACON \[V/O\]: So this is my favourite trick... DEACON INTERVIEW MCU DEACON. DEACON: We present our guest with a plate of biz-ghetti. And then I will say, "Why don't you eat some biz- ghetti?"</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. DINING ROOM - NIGHT. DINNER PARTY - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS NICK, JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. DEACON: Please Nick... eat some biz-ghetti. MS NICK EATING SPAGHETTI. VIAGO, JOSEPHINE AND JACKIE IN BG. DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: I didn't realize you enjoyed eating worms... Nick. MWS JOSEPHINE, JACKIE AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE. PAN TO MWS JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE. O/S NICK, VLADISLAV IN LEFT FG. PAN AND TILT TO MS, AS NICK STANDS.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>No. No.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[OFF\]: They are worms. MWS JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S NICK AND VIAGO. NICK: There's worms wriggling around on my plate. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: It is wormlike, but not actually worms. H/A WS VIAGO, JOSEPHINE AND JACKIE AT TABLE. ZOOM IN. VIAGO: This is merely biz-ghetti. DEACON \[V/O\]: We stole that idea from The Lost Boys. DEACON INTERVIEW MS DEACON SEATED. DEACON: But I put a nice twist on it.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. DINING ROOM - NIGHT. DINNER PARTY - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS NICK AND VIAGO. VLADISLAV, JOSEPHINE AND JACKIE SEATED AT TABLE IN FG. DEACON STANDS IN FG. DEACON: Nick... how does it feel to have a snake for a penis? MWS JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV. ZOOM OUT AND PAN TO MCU NICK. VIAGO IN BG. PAN AS NICK MOVES.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: Jackie... my penis has disappeared. There's a cobra snake. MWS VLADISLAV, NICK, VIAGO, JOSEPHINE AND DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. DEACON: Penis trick. MS NICK. VIAGO, JOSEPHINE AND JACKIE IN BG. JACKIE: No one is going to mistake your penis for a cobra, Nick. Okay? Believe you me.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: What did you put in my spaghetti? You guys are magicians, aren't you? MWS VLADISLAV, NICK, VIAGO, JOSEPHINE AND DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. DEACON STARTS TO SIT. DEACON: No, it is just a normal penis. MCU NICK, VIAGO IN BG. NICK: I'm out. I'm out. MS JOSEPHINE SEATED AT TABLE. VIAGO \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: Josephine... MWS VIAGO, JOSEPHINE, JACKIE, DEACON AND VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] AT TABLE. PAN AROUND.</scene_description>
    <character>JOSEPHINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Mmm.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: ...do you like biz-ghetti? MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, JOSEPHINE, JACKIE AND DEACON AT TABLE.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT. NICK TRIES TO LEAVE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MCU NICK. HE TURNS AND WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN. NICK: Look, ah, these freaks... ah, spike my spaghetti, make my cock turn into a snake. This is not cool. Not cool. MS NICK WALKING TRACK BACK. MS NICK TRYING TO OPEN DOOR. PAN AS HE WALKS TO ANOTHER DOOR. NICK: You don't think this is weird? MS NICK WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TRACK IN. PAN AS HE WALKS TO DOOR. NICK: For fuck's sakes. CU NICK WALKING INTO ROOM. PAN AND TRACK IN AS HE WALKS TO WINDOW. NICK: Jackie! MS NICK \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] AT WINDOW. ZOOM IN AND PULL FOCUS TO H/A WS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] JACKIE BESIDE CAR. ZOOM OUT AS SHE GETS INTO CAR. VLADISLAV ENTERS FROM BOTTOM OF FRAME IN FG. PAN AS NICK RUNS. NICK: Jackie! JACKIE: Sorry Nick. NICK \[OFF\]: What are you doing? Jackie! \[Gasps\]. MCU NICK RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TRACK IN AND PAN. HE OPENS DOOR TO REVEAL JOSEPHINE LYING DEAD ON TABLE AND VIAGO TRYING TO DRINK HER BLOOD. NICK TURNS AND EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME. ZOOM IN TO VIAGO DRINKING JOSEPHINE'S BLOOD. PAN. NICK: Shit! Shit! \[Gargles\]. MS BAT ATTACKING NICK \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. NICK RUNS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. MCU NICK LOOKING OVER HIS SHOULDER. HE TURNS AND WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TRACK IN. PAN AND TILT TO CU VLADISLAV AS CAT. PAN AND TILT TO MCU NICK. VLADISLAV \[AS CAT\]: \[Meows, hisses\]. NICK: What the fuck? Nah. Nah. MWS NICK RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. HE TURNS AND RUNS BACK, VIAGO ENTER LEFT OF FRAME AND CHASES NICK. TRACK BACK AND PAN AS NICK RUNS. VIAGO ENTERS FRAME THROUGH DOORWAY IN BG. NICK TURNS AND RUNS TO DOOR. PAN AROUND AS HE RUNS INTO ROOM AND CLOSES DOOR.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO \[OFF\]: \[Growls, hisses\]. MS NICK AT DOOR.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Fuck off.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU NICK AT DOOR. PAN AROUND ROOM. PAN TO MCU NICK. DEACON'S HAND ENTERS FRAME FROM BEHIND NICK AND GRABS HIM. NICK: Where am I? \[Breathes heavily\]. MS DEACON AND NICK STRUGGLING. TILT DOWN AS NICK PUSHES DEACON. PAN AS EH AND THROWS DEACON ACROSS ROOM. PAN TO MS NICK. TRACK IN AS HE RUNS OUT OF ROOM INTO VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV FLYING DOWN HALL WAY. TRACK BACK AS NICK IS CHASED BY VAMPIRES. NICK EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME. PAN.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO, VLADISLAV AND DEACON: \[Hiss, laugh\]. PAN TO MS NICK RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN. TILT DOWN AS HE FALLS DOWN STAIRS. NICK RUNS TO DOOR. PAN TO WS DEACON AND VLADISLAV IN MID-AIR. PAN TO MS NICK RUNNING THROUGH DOOR. TILT UP TO MS VIAGO. PAN TO MS NICK RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. PETYR APPEARS OUT OF THE DARKNESS AND GRABS NICK. HE PULLS HIM OUT RIGHT OF FRAME. NICK: \[Grunts\]. Fuck! \[Grunts\].</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON AND VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hiss\].</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Freaks!</dialogue>
    <character>PETYR:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU GRASS. PAN \[NICK'S POINT OF VIEW\].</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAN TO MS VIAGO. DEACON AND VLADISLAV IN BG. VIAGO TURNS AND WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. FADE TO BLACK. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Oh no. Petyr got him.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Poor guy.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: Who let Petyr out? BLACK.: FADE IN MWS JACKIE \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] HOSING OFF BLOOD ON DRIVEWAY. TILT UP TO WS JACKIE. TILT DOWN TO CU BLOOD. FADE TO BLACK. BLACK.: FADE IN TITLE: Two months later BLACK.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. DEACON DANCES. NICK THE VAMPIRE VISITS</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS DEACON DANCING. MS DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\] DANCING. VLADISLAV IN BG. PAN TO MWS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV SEATED ON FLOOR. DEACON DANCING IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. WS DEACON DANCING. MWS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV SEATED ON FLOOR. NICK'S FEET ENTER LEFT OF FRAME. PAN AND TILT UP.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Hey guys!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS NICK HOVERING OUTSIDE WINDOW. ZOOM IN TO MS. NICK: Hey, what are you guys doing? MS DEACON. PAN AS HE TAKES NEEDLE OF GRAMOPHONE. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: What are you doing, Nick? DEACON: Come in to the house. MS NICK HOVERING OUTSIDE WINDOW. PAN TO MWS DEACON. ZOOM IN TO MS. MS NICK HOVERING OUTSIDE WINDOW. HE STARTS TO CLIMB THROUGH WINDOW. NICK \[V/O, ON\]: Hi, my name is Nick. NICK: Hey guys. What are you up to? NICK \[V/O\]: I've been a vampire for two months. NICK INTERVIEW MCU NICK. MWS NICK CLIMBING THROUGH WINDOW. VIAGO AND VLADISLAV \[BACKS TO CAMERA\] IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Probably, I reckon, the best thing about being a vampire is flying. Like I've always wanted to - I think everyone has always wanted to fly. And now I can do it.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Nick TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Recent Vampire</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. NICK THE VAMPIRE VISITS - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS NICK CLIMBING THROUGH WINDOW. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. MWS NICK CLIMBING THROUGH WINDOW. VIAGO AND VLADISLAV IN FG. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK CLIMBING THROUGH WINDOW. VIAGO, VLADISLAV AND DEACON IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Breathes heavily\].</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Nick, why don't you use the front door?</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Scoffs\] Why would I? I'm flying.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Petyr bit me... sucked all my blood out. I woke up in his basement, and he offered me some blood.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK INTERVIEW MCU PETYR. TILT DOWN TO CU PETYR'S HANDS. MS NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>I just thought it was something - some German thing that these guys do.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT/INT. ACCIDENT AND URGENT MEDICAL CENTRE - NIGHT</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS NICK WALKING PAN AS HE WALKS. TILT UP TO SIGN: "ACCIDENT AND URGENT MEDICAL CENTRE. URGENT PHARMACY."</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>The transition into becoming a vampire was pretty hard. I looked like shit to start off with. Like, I had a massive gash in my neck. Like, you could see the inside of my neck. I had blood all over my top. And then I came home, and I was sweating. I was either really hot or really cold.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK \[V/O\]: It was like a hangover times ten, I reckon. It was really bad. M2S MEDICAL CENTRE RECEPTIONIST AND NICK AT COUNTER. WS NICK IN WAITING ROOM. MS NICK BEING EXAMINED BY DOCTOR. ZOOM IN. MS NICK BEING EXAMINED BY DOCTOR. DOCTOR EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME TO MCU NICK. PAN TO MCU DOCTOR.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. NICK'S HOUSE - NIGHT. NICK TRANSITIONS</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS NICK ON BED. NICK: \[Breathes heavily\]. MS NICK LOOKING AT REFLECTION IN MIRROR. REFLECTION FADES. NICK \[V/O\]: It was quite similar to having the flu... H/A MS NICK IN BED. HIS HEAD MOVING VERY FAST. NICK: ...except the only difference would probably be... that my eyes bled heaps. WS NICK DOING BACKBEND ON BED. MCU NICK WITH BLEEDING EYES. ZOOM IN. L/A MCU NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Are you guys not cold?</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I don't know, I can't explain it. Like, it was just - yeah, just real hot and cold, and like, bloody eyes and flying and stuff.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>L/A MWS NICK HOVERING IN CORNER OF CEILING. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. NICK THE VAMPIRE VISITS - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS NICK. PAN TO MS DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>The neighbours can see you flying around the house. You want to draw attention to this house, mmm?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>You've got a whole documentary crew following you around.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>I'm doing an erotic dance for my friends, and you ruined it. I was in the zone. My friends were loving it.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS NICK AND DEACON. VIAGO AND VLADISLAV IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>I love - ah, I saw the end of it. It looked great.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I don't - I don't know if I'm, ah,</dialogue>
    <scene_description>being - if I'm accepted yet. But I don't know, I think it's getting there. I know they're old and stuff, but they're quite naïve when it comes to the real world.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Thanks.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK. ZOOM IN TO MCU. H/A MS VIAGO. NICK \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV. NICK \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. NICK INTERVIEW MS NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>So... I don't know, it'd be cool to just hang out with them. They can teach me some stuff. I can probably teach them a few things.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK SCRATCHING ON GRAMOPHONE. VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND DEACON IN BG. WS NICK, PETYR AND VIAGO WATCHING BAD RECEPTION ON TELEVISION. DEACON ENTERS LEFT OF FRAME IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>At the start it was like, "Oh no, like, I'm dead." It's, kind of, affected my friendship with normal people, my family and stuff. But I've - the way I see it, I've got a whole new family.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON - NIGHT. NEW FRIEND NICK</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS NICK FLYING. DEACON, VLADISLAV AND VIAGO ENTER LEFT OF FRAME FLYING.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Cheers\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VLADISLAV, NICK, DEACON AND VIAGO ON BICYCLES. TRACK BACK. NICK \[V/O\]: They accept me for who I am, and I accept them for who they are. MS NICK AND VIAGO WITH ORANGE AND HANDKERCHIEF. VIAGO: \[Makes computer game noise\]. NICK: \[Makes computer game noise\]. CU REFLECTION IN MIRROR OF HANDKERCHIEF AND ORANGE. NICK \[V/O\]: Even though one of them killed me.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON - NIGHT. OUT ON THE TOWN WITH NICK AND STU</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON, VIAGO AND NICK WALKING DOWN STREET. PAN. VLADISLAV: Where shall we go tonight? MS NICK, DEACON, VLADISLAV AND VIAGO WALKING DOWN STREET. TRACK BACK. DEACON: Let's go to The Big Kumara. MS VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND NICK WALKING. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV, NICK AND DEACON WALKING. THEY STOP. NICK: Why don't we go to Boogie Wonderland? VLADISLAV: We never get into Boogie Wonderland. NICK: No. My friend Richard is the bouncer. He can get us in. VIAGO: What? Really? I... MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND NICK. ON STREET. NICK: He'll invite us in. MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV, STUFF, VIAGO AND NICK. ZOOM IN TO M2S STU AND VIAGO. NICK: Stu is keen. Stu loves it. VIAGO: Who? Is that Stu? NICK \[V/O, ON\]: Um, this is my friend Stu. NICK AND STU INTERVIEW M2S STU AND NICK. STU: Hey. NICK: Hey. CU STU. NICK \[OFF\]: He works in computers and stuff. M2S STU AND NICK. NICK \[ON/OFF\]: Originally he went out with my sister. And then they broke up. I didn't really get into it. Like, it's got nothing to do with me. And, um... you can't hear me. CU NICK. PAN TO CU STU. CU NICK. PAN TO CU STU. ZOOM OUT TO M2S STU AND NICK. NICK: All right. So basically... Stu doesn't know that I'm a vampire, and he doesn't know that my friends are vampires. CU NICK. ZOOM OUT TO NICK, DEACON, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV WALKING DOWN STREET. TRACK BACK. NICK \[V/O\]: He just thinks that I've just... met some colourful friends. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: That's a rose. And that's - this is jasmine.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I - I bought him round to the house, and they all thought I'd bought, like, a meal for everyone. It just, like, it really, really sucks that I can't eat him.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV, STU, VIAGO AND NICK. ZOOM IN TO MS STU. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO IN EDGES OF FRAME. CU NICK. M2S STU AND NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>I just want to, like... ahhh...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU NICK. PAN TO CU STU.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Look at it. He's the reddest guy I know.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S STU AND NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>But... you can hear me.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, like computer-based stuff, eh? Mainly.</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, yeah. Like, yeah. Geo databases. Yeah.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah. Like, computers mainly.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: Let's have a vote. For Boogie Wonderland or The Big Kumara.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON - NIGHT. OUT ON THE TOWN WITH NICK AND STU -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED MCU DEACON. NICK IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. ZOOM OUT TO MWS NICK, DEACON, STU, VLADISLAV AND VIAGO. DEACON: Big Kumara. MWS NICK, DEACON, STU, VLADISLAV AND VIAGO. ZOOM IN TO MCU DEACON. NICK, VIAGO, STU AND VLADISLAV CROSS FRAME FG AND BG. NICK: Right. DEACON: Great. NICK \[OFF\]: Careful, Stu. Hurry up. DEACON \[V/O\]: I don't think Nick should have been turned into a vampire. DEACON INTERVIEW MCU DEACON. DEACON: He's such a dick.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. BOOGIE WONDERLAND - NIGHT. BOOGIE WONDERLAND</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS NICK WALKING TO BOUNCER. OTHERS IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>BAR PATRONS \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[General chatter\].</dialogue>
    <character>BOUNCER:</character>
    <dialogue>How are you, brother? Looking great, man.</dialogue>
    <character>BOUNCER \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Gentlemen. You are most welcome \[laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS STU, VIAGO AND DEACON. BOUNCER AND NICK IN EDGES OF FRAME IN FG. MWS NICK, BOUNCER AND VLADISLAV. MS VIAGO WALKING. PAN TO CU DEACON. OTHERS IN BG. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO WALKING THROUGH CROWD. TRACK IN. CU MIRROR BALLS. MS DEACON. OTHERS IN BG. PAN TO M2S DEACON AND VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>We're in Boogie Wonderland.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S VIAGO AND NICK. OTHERS IN BG. NICK EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME. VIAGO STARTS TO FOLLOW.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>So here we are at Boogie Wonderland. And it is so much fun. They have an electric floor.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO. MCU VIAGO. MWS DEACON AND VIAGO. OTHERS IN BG. TILT DOWN AS VIAGO POINTS AT LIGHTS ON DANCE FLOOR. VIAGO: This is amazing. VIAGO \[V/O\]: I'm just so happy to be here. MS VLADISLAV WALKING TO WOMAN. OTHERS IN BG. PAN AS WOMAN STARTS TO WALK TOWARDS VLADISLAV. DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: This place is pretty cheesy. M2S VIAGO AND DEACON. OTHERS IN BG. DEACON: Also did you see the jacket he wore? He's wearing the same jacket as me. VIAGO: Not exactly the same. It's... DEACON: It's pretty close. MS NICK DANCING. OTHERS IN FG. MWS VIAGO LINING UP TO BITE WOMAN. OTHERS IN FG AND BG. M2S VIAGO AND WOMAN \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. OTHERS IN BG. NICK \[V/O, ON\]: What? Of course not. I'm just loving being a vampire at the moment. CU NICK WITH BLOODY MOUTH. M2S VLADISLAV AND WOMAN DANCING. OTHERS IN BG. M2S VLADISLAV AND OTHERS DANCING. PAN. CU VLADISLAV. VIAGO, NICK AND OTHERS IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON WATERFRONT - NIGHT. THE VAMPIRES MEET THE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WEREWOLVES WS VIAGO, VLADISLAV, NICK, DEACON AND STU WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. NICK: I went there. It's a bit - the Fat Ladies Arms, ah, on Wednesdays they do, like, a Fear Factor competition. You can win, like, T- shirts and, um, hats, and spot prizes. It's like... MS NICK. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO IN BG. PAN TO MCU DEACON. VLADISLAV IN BG. MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV, NICK AND VIAGO WALKING. TRACK. DEACON: \[sniffs\].</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: I can smell werewolves. PAN TO WS WEREWOLVES WALKING. NICK \[OFF\]: What real ones?</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Keep cool.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: We're just about to walk past some werewolves, so some shit might go down. MS DEACON AND VLADISLAV WALKING. TRACK. MS DEACON AND VLADISLAV WALKING. PAN TO NICK AND DEACON WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] ANTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. PAN AS WEREWOLVES WALK. STU AND VIAGO IN FG. DEACON: Look out, guys. Don't catch fleas. ANTON: What's that mate?</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Deacon...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS DEACON. WEREWOLVES WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] IN BG. PAN TO MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV AND VIAGO WALKING. WEREWOLVES IN BG. DEACON: Sorry, what? VLADISLAV: Keep going. Keep walking. Keep walking. ANTON: What? We heard that, mate. We've got sensitive hearing.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Have you?</dialogue>
    <character>ANTON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS ANTON. DECLAN AND NATHAN IN BG. ANTON: What are you filming? Is it a music video, is it? CLIFTON \[OFF\]: Come on, guys. Just leave it. Come on. VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: We don't want any trouble. MS VLADISLAV, DEACON, VIAGO AND STU. PAN AS DEACON STEPS FORWARD. PAN AROUND TO WS ANTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN LEFT FG. CLIFTON \[OFF\]: Well then why did you - why did you start it then? DEACON: I do. Have I got your heckles up, huh? Why don't you smell your own crotches, huh? MWS DEACON AND ANTON. VIAGO, NICK, VLADISLAV IN BG. DION IN FG. VIAGO: Oh, come on Deacon. Stop it. DION: What are you talking about? We don't smell our own crotches, we smell each other's crotches. And it's a form of... greeting. WS CLIFTON, ANTON, DION AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. M2S DEACON AND VIAGO. MWS CLIFTON, ANTON AND DION AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. DEACON AND VLADISLAV IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. PAN TO MWS CLIFTON, ANTON AND DION. ANTON: You're on camera, mate. Don't - don't do it.</scene_description>
    <character>CLIFTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <character>DION:</character>
    <dialogue>What?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CLIFTON: It's okay, because I know this guy. It's Count Fagula.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laugh\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S DEACON AND VIAGO. PAN TO M2S VLADISLAV AND NICK. ANTON \[OFF\]: Hey, hey, hey. Don't swear. MS CLIFTON, ANTON AND DION. VLADISLAV IN LEFT FG. PAN TO MWS CLIFTON, ANTON AND DION. OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. CLIFTON: Sorry. They - they - I'm very... ANTON: Yeah, we're werewolves. CLIFTON: Not swear-wolves. ANTON: What are we? WEREWOLVES: Werewolves not swear-wolves. MWS NICK, DEACON, VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND STU. NICK: Faggot is not a swear word. ANTON \[OFF\]: No. VLADISLAV: That's a very offensive word to call people. WEREWOLF \[OFF\]: Listen to Anton. CLIFTON \[OFF/ON\]: It's offensive, but is it a swear word? WS DION, ANTON, CLIFTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. ANTON: Well, unless you're talking about a bundle of sticks. CLIFTON: Or is it... MWS NICK, DEACON, VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND STU. DEACON STEPS FORWARD AND PRETENDS TO THROW STICKS. DEACON: Chase this bundle of sticks... werewolves. WS DION, ANTON, CLIFTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. DEACON EXITS LEFT OF FRAME IN FG. PAN TO WS NATHAN AS HE RUNS. CLIFTON \[OFF\]: No, no, no. No, no. It's not real. It's just... ANTON: Don't get it. Nathan, it's not real. MS VIAGO AND CLIFTON. DECLAN IN BG. VIAGO SLAPS CLIFTON WITH GLOVE. CLIFTON: He's just going to take off his gloves. DECLAN: He's taking his glove off, all right. CLIFTON: Ah! Shit man. What the fuck did you do that for? WEREWOLVES: Oh \[laugh et cetera.\]. PROFILE MCU CLIFTON. PAN TO MCU VIAGO. ANTON \[OFF\]: Hey! CLIFTON \[OFF\]: That was... MS VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND CLIFTON. ANTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. PAN TO MWS CLIFTON, ANTON, DION AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. ANTON: Don't swear. We're gonna lose it. We're gonna lose it. CLIFTON: But he slapped me. MS VLADISLAV. NICK AND STU IN BG. PAN TO M2S VIAGO AND VLADISLAV. NICK IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>DION \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Snarls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ANTON: Whoa whoa whoa. Hey calm down. Calm down. Dion. Dion. MS ANTON AND DION. OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. DION STARTS TO TRANSFORM. DION: \[Snarls\] Oh shit. I've still got my glasses \[snarls\]. M2S VIAGO AND VLADISLAV. PAN TO MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, NICK AND STU. VLADISLAV: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Snarl\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ANTON \[OFF\]: Hey, hey. Whoa, whoa. MWS CLIFTON, WEREWOLF, ANTON AND DION. PAN TO M2S DION AND NATHAN AS NATHAN STARTS TO TRANSFORM. PAN. ANTON: Who. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Do the breathing. Do the breathing. MWS ANTON HOLDING TRANSFORMING NATHAN. OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. WEREWOLVES \[OFF\]: Okay. Do the breathing. Hold it \[et cetera\]. WEREWOLF: \[Breathes heavily\]. ANTON: Count to ten, mate. That's all right. Come on. CLIFTON \[OFF\]: Count to ten, human again. Count to ten, human again. Count to ten, human again. M2S ANTON HOLDING TRANSFORMING NATHAN. OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. PAN TO CLIFTON, OTHER WEREWOLVES AND ANTON. ANTON: It's all right. It's not a full moon. MWS NICK, DEACON, VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND STU. ANTON \[OFF/ON\]: Thanks a lot, guys. Enjoy your night. Yeah. MWS CLIFTON, ANTON AND DION. OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. CLIFTON: Should be ashamed of yourselves, man. ANTON: Great. We didn't want this to happen.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO, VLADISLAV AND DEACON \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hiss\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VIAGO HISSING. NICK AND STU IN BG. PAN TO MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV, AND VIAGO HISSING. NICK IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>ANTON AND WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Howl\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS ANTON. CLIFTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. THEY HOWL. MWS VIAGO, NICK AND VLADISLAV. DEACON ENTERS LEFT OF FRAME. ANTON \[OFF\]: Come on, guys. CLIFTON \[OFF\]: Hey. Say it, don't spray it, bitch.</scene_description>
    <character>ANTON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Clifton!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS ANTON, CLIFTON, DION AND OTHER WEREWOLVES WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\].</scene_description>
    <character>ANTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Why are you swearing all the time?</dialogue>
    <character>CLIFTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Well, he riled me up.</dialogue>
    <character>ANTON AND WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[General chatter\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK. STU AND DEACON IN BG. TRACK BACK AS THEY WALK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Were they actually werewolves?</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Ja.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO WALKING. DEACON AND VLADISLAV IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Are you okay, Stu?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS STU. HE STARTS TO WALK. PAN TO WS DEACON, VLADISLAV, NICK, VIAGO AND STU WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\].</scene_description>
    <character>VAMPIRES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[General chatter\].</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I just don't really know how to approach this, because I've never done it before.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK INTERVIEW MCU NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Um, and he is a good friend, and I don't want to...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: I don't want to break that friendship. But... then again, ah, what do you do when someone tells you that they're a vampire?</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. NICK TELLS STU HE'S A VAMPIRE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>PAN TO MS NICK WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. PAN AROUND AS NICK WALKS TO STU TILT DOWN AS HE SITS TO MWS STU AND NICK SEATED AT TABLE. NICK \[V/O\]: I'm expecting him to be angry. He might be scared. I'm expecting a lot of things to - to bubble to the surface. MWS STU AND NICK SEATED AT TABLE. NICK: You probably notice there's been... I've been through... a few changes lately. STU: Yeah. NICK: Yeah? STU: Yeah. NICK: Like, I don't show up for lunch anymore. STU: Yeah.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>And how I've... changed all our - all our tennis games to night-time tennis games.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU NICK. CU STU.</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Right...</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>And how you went from beating me every time, and now how I - I've won the last three?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAN TO MWS STU AND NICK SEATED AT TABLE. CU NICK'S HANDS ON TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU STU.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>So... the reason I bought you here...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS STU AND NICK SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>...is to tell you that... I'm a vampire.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu took it pretty well. He's definitely my best mate, and I'm not going to eat him.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU STU.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>If they ever offer you spaghetti, um... you shouldn't eat it.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS STU AND NICK SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>I think they offered me biscotti.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Vampire mates don't eat human mates.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU NICK. L/A M2S STU AND NICK SEATED ON STAIRS.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>And no matter how much I wanted to eat him, I'll never eat him, because he's my mate. Eh, Stu?</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. FUN WITH STU</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS STU WALKING WITH TELEVISION. TRACK BACK.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu is great.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED ON COUCH. VIAGO: We really like him. MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED ON COUCH. VLADISLAV: At first I wanted to kill him. But now I'm glad I spent the time to get to know him. H/A MS STU WITH TELEVISION. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Ja, of course he looks delicious, with his big red cheeks. But we've all got an agreement that we're not going to eat Stu, right? MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED ON COUCH.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Right.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S PETYR AND NICK. NICK: The guys upstairs they're - they're - they're loving him. They - at the - at the start they were a bit, oh who is this human you're bringing into the house? But it took them literally two minutes and - they like him more than they like me, I reckon. MCU DEACON KNITTING. DEACON: I am knitting a scarf for Stu. MWS DEACON SEATED AT TABLE KNITTING. STU \[V/O\]: Try and attack. WS VIAGO AND STU IN TAE KWON DO UNIFORMS. STU: Use your legs.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO AND STU IN TAE KWON DO UNIFORMS. PAN AS VIAGO FLIES THROUGH AIR.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Wow.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU \[V/O, ON\]: Step back, and block, ha! WS VIAGO AND STU DOING TAE KWON DO.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO AND STU DOING TAE KWON DO. STU: And punching high. Yep.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Hi.</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Yep.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S PETYR AND NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>I'm just - what I'm trying to say is... because I know that you - you turned me into a vampire. Maybe don't do that to him.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU PETYR.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>He's a vegetarian. The last thing he'd want to do is eat a live being, or eat blood or eat meat.</dialogue>
    <character>PETYR:</character>
    <dialogue>Mmmm.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU STU, VIAGO AND DEACON \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\] AROUND COMPUTER. ZOOM OUT.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I am controlling this.</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Get it. Get it.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>It's quite amazing to see how far technology can go forward if you're not paying attention.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO TEXTING ON CELL PHONE. STU IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. PAN AND TILT TO MCU VIAGO. MCU VIAGO WITH CELL PHONE. PAN TO MCU DEACON WITH CELL PHONE. STU IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. MWS DEACON \[WITH CELL PHONE\], STU AND VIAGO. DEACON: One message received. Oh! CU CELL PHONE IN DEACON'S HAND. TEXT MESSAGE: VIAGO. THER IZ A CRUCIFX BEHIND YOU. DEACON \[off/on\]: "There is a crucifix behind you." MWS DEACON \[WITH CELL PHONE\], STU AND VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU \[V/O, ON\]: So, down on that one, like, halfway down will focus it. Maybe smile. M2S VLADISLAV AND STU WITH PHONE. CU VLADISLAV TAKING SELFIE. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV AND VIAGO. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VIAGO, VLADISLAV AND STU. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF CLOWN AND VLADISLAV. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV WITH DEER SKULL. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV. ZOOM IN. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: Anything you want to find, you... MS STU. VLADISLAV IN RIGHT FG. VIAGO AND DEACON \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. STU: Yeah. You can type in... VLADISLAV: ...you write - you write it into this. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: I lost a really nice silk scarf in about 1912. MS STU, VIAGO AND DEACON AT COMPUTER. ZOOM IN. CU STU HEAD IN HANDS. VIAGO AND DEACON \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S VIAGO AND DEACON. STU IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. DEACON: Yes, now Google it.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>And...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: Stu is the first human friend that I've had for a long time. MWS DEACON, STU AND VIAGO AT POTTERY WHEEL. CU VLADISLAV. VLADISLAV: With humans there is a tendency to die. MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV SEATED ON COUCH.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU STU'S HAND ON COMPUTER. VLADISLAV'S HANDS IN BG. STU \[OFF\]: We can look at her photos. H/A M2S VLADISLAV AND STU AT COMPUTER. VLADISLAV: Ah, oh yes. STU: Or we could poke her.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS DEACON, STU AND VIAGO AT COMPUTER. DEACON: Can we see a movie of a sunrise? MWS NICK, DEACON, STU, VLADISLAV AND VIAGO \[BACKS TO CAMERA\] AT COMPUTER. THEY START TO WATCH VIDEO OF SUNRISE.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh shit.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh. Nice.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>H/A MS STU. VLADISLAV IN RIGHT FG. VIAGO AND DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. TILT UP. STU: If we push "Images," then we can see pictures of virgins. MWS VIAGO, DEACON, STU AND VLADISLAV AT COMPUTER.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Ja, ja, ja, ja, ja. DEACON: Yes. WS VLADISLAV, STU, VIAGO AND DEACON AT COMPUTER.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh yeah.</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Whoops</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: No, go back. Go back. VLADISLAV: I don't think she's a virgin if she's doing that. CU RECORD ON GRAMOPHONE. MS DEACON AT GRAMOPHONE. HE STARTS TO SCRATCH. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. VIAGO SKYPES PHILLIP</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CU COMPUTER. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. STU'S HAND USES KEYBOARD. VIAGO: There he is, yeah. This is my old servant, Phillip.</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh, okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS STU AND VIAGO AT COMPUTER. STU: So we're gonna call him.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Ja.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU: And maximise the screen. CU COMPUTER. ON SCREEN: IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. IMAGE OF PHILLIP APPEARS ON SCREEN. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. VIAGO: \[GASPS\]. My God, that's him. That's him, that him. That's Phillip. That's Phillip. He looks so old \[laughs\].</scene_description>
    <character>PHILLIP \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Master...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS STU AND VIAGO AT COMPUTER. ZOOM IN. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Master... PHILLIP \[V/O, ON, IN GERMAN\]: ...Master Viago. CU PHILLIP ON COMPUTER. IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: It has been so long, you look the same.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <character>PHILLIP \[ON/OFF, IN GERMAN\]:</character>
    <dialogue>It has been so long, you look the same. Tell me, did you find Katherine?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO AT COMPUTER, STU IN BG. CU PHILLIP ON COMPUTER. IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Tell me, did you find Katherine? MCU VIAGO AT COMPUTER, STU IN BG. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Ahm, there's no hurry y'know, love is patient. VIAGO \[ON/OFF, IN GERMAN\]: Um, there's no hurry, you know, love is patient. Listen, Phillip. You paid the wrong fare on the box. CU PHILLIP ON COMPUTER. IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Listen, Phillip. You paid the wrong fare on the box. MCU VIAGO AT COMPUTER, STU IN BG. CU PHILLIP ON COMPUTER. IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: What? TITLE \[SUPERED\]: For the coffin. You paid the wrong fare and it took me ages to get here.</scene_description>
    <character>PHILLIP \[IN GERMAN\]:</character>
    <dialogue>What?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO \[IN GERMAN\]: Yes. For the coffin. You paid the wrong fare and it took me ages to get here. MWS STU AND VIAGO AT COMPUTER. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Master... PHILLIP \[OFF/ON, IN GERMAN\]: Master, you promised you would turn me into a vampire. I am 90 years old. CU PHILLIP ON COMPUTER. IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Master, you promised you would turn me into a vampire. MCU VIAGO AT COMPUTER, STU IN BG. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: I am 90 years old. VIAGO: Oh. PHILLIP \[OFF/ON, IN GERMAN\]: You promised, and now I am so old. CU PHILLIP ON COMPUTER. IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: You promised, and now I am so old. VIAGO \[IN GERMAN\]: Yes. Well, it was great you, Phillip. Goodbye Phillip. MCU VIAGO AT COMPUTER, STU IN BG. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Well it was great seeing you, Phillip. CU PHILLIP ON COMPUTER. IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. MCU VIAGO AT COMPUTER, STU IN BG. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: I never did anything with my life</scene_description>
    <character>PHILLIP \[OFF/ON, IN GERMAN\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I never did anything with my life. I've been waiting.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU PHILLIP ON COMPUTER. IMAGE OF VIAGO AND STU. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. STU'S FINGER POINTS. VIAGO'S FINGER CLICKS BUTTON. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: I've been waiting...</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Ah, just - just click that. Yeah, that one.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU VIAGO. STU IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. RITA ANGUS RETIREMENT VILLAGE - NIGHT. VIAGO WATCHES</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>KATHERINE WS STREET. WS RITA ANGUS RETIREMENT VILLAGE. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Rita Angus Retirement Village WS VIAGO ON STREET. PAN AND TILT UP TO WINDOW. KATHERINE ENTERS FRAME THROUGH WINDOW. ZOOM IN. PAN TO WS VIAGO ON STREET. FADE TO BLACK. BLACK.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. COURTENAY PLACE - NIGHT. OUT ON THE TOWN AGAIN</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS COURTENAY PLACE. WS TRAFFIC ON COURTENAY PLACE. WS VLADISLAV, DEACON, STU, NICK AND VIAGO CROSSING ROAD.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. BAR - NIGHT. NICK TELLS EVERYONE HE'S A VAMPIRE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS WOMAN AND VLADISLAV DANCING. OTHERS IN FG. ZOOM IN. BAR PATRONS: \[General chatter\]. WS WOMAN AND STU SEATED AT TABLE. NICK AND WOMAN IN BG. OTHERS IN FG. PAN TO M2S WOMAN AND STU. STU: ...data about where things are. WOMAN: Oh, like, Google Map stuff? STU: Yeah, kind of like Google Maps. But, like, more - more layers of information. NICK \[V/O, ON\]: The movie Twilight. Have you seen it? MS NICK AND PEOPLE IN BAR. ZOOM IN TO MCU NICK. BAR PATRON IN LEFT FG.</scene_description>
    <character>BAR PATRON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK \[ON/OFF\]: Okay, I am the main guy Twilight. You know the main guy? Twilight? That's me. There's cameras following me around, they could've chosen anyone. CU DEACON. TILT DOWN AS HE CLUTCHES HIS FOREHEAD. VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: How many people have you told you're a vampire? MS NICK. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Not many.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: I heard that girl talking about it. She said you're a vampire. NICK: Yeah, I told her.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Who else?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: Who did you tell? NICK: Ah, I told her hot friend. VLADISLAV: You can't tell everyone that you're \[whispers\]: a vampire. MS NICK. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO IN FG. PAN AND TILT TO PEOPLE SEATED AT TABLE. VIAGO: Who is that guy? MS NICK. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO IN FG. NICK: I don't know. But I trust him. VIAGO: Oh \[sighs\]. Keep it under your hat. MS NICK. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO IN FG. VLADISLAV: You can't tell everyone. NICK: Okay. All right. I won't.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON STREET - NIGHT. NICK TELLS MORE PEOPLE HE'S A</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>VAMPIRE WS NICK WALKING TO GROUP OF PEOPLE. NICK: I'm a vampire! \[Laughs\]. CROWD: \[Cheer et cetera\]. WS NICK WALKING PAST MEN ON STREET.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Vampire!</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. FIX CONVENIENCE STORE - NIGHT. NICK FREAKS OUT THE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>ATTENDANT MWS FIX ATTENDANT, NICK AND DEACON AT COUNTER. STU IN BG. NICK: Yeah, got a bit of a eye condition. FIX ATTENDANT: What's wrong with them? NICK: Ah, vampire eyes. Can't go into the sun. MS DEACON. STU IN BG. WOMAN \[V/O, ON\]: Oh my God. Are they your fangs?</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. BAR. NIGHT. NICK SHOWS HIS FANGS</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS NICK AND WOMAN \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN BAR.</scene_description>
    <character>WOMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>For real?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: For real real. It's too real real. NICK \[V/O, ON\]: I'm a vampire, bro.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. BAR - NIGHT. NICK TALKS TO VAMPIRE HUNTER</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS MAN, VAMPIRE HUNTER AND NICK AT BAR. OTHERS IN FG AND BG. NICK STARTS TO WALK \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. VAMPIRE HUNTER: You're a vampire?</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VAMPIRE HUNTER: I'm a vampire hunter, man. NICK: \[Laughs\]. No, you're not. VAMPIRE HUNTER: I am. NICK: Fuck you, piece of shit. I'll Skype you.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. FIX CONVENIENCE STORE - NIGHT. NICK SHOWS OFF</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>M2S NICK AND DEACON. STU IN BG. NICK: I can float, I can transform into stuff. MWS FIX ATTENDANT, NICK AND DEACON AT COUNTER. STU IN BG. ZOOM IN. NICK PULLS FACE. ZOOM IN. PAN TO MCU FIX ATTENDANT. PAN TO MS NICK. DEACON AND STU IN BG. ZOOM OUT AS NICK EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME. DEACON STARTS TO WALK. FIX ATTENDANT: Same. NICK: No, you can't. FIX ATTENDANT: Yeah. I'll show you \[makes transforming noise\]. You show me. Show me some of your vampire stuff.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Um.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: Ah, what have I got, um \[hisses\]. NICK \[OFF/ON\]: Don't lie about transforming into shit.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON - NIGHT. BAT FIGHT</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS NICK WALKING. DEACON AND VLADISLAV IN BG. DEACON WALKS TO NICK TO M2S. TRACK BACK AS THEY WALK. THEY STOP AND START TO PUSH EACH OTHER. STU, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Twilight!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: Shut up Nick! DEACON: You're not Twilight. NICK: What's your problem? DEACON: You - you are my problem. Telling the world that we are vampires. NICK: And I'll tell the whole world that you're an arsehole, now as well.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Shut up!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: You shut up!</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Guys...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: You shut up! NICK: No, you shut up! DEACON: No, you shut up! NICK: You shut up! MS NICK. PAN TO WS AS NICK PUSHES DEACON. STU, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV IN BG. NICK: I'm Dracula, man! MWS DEACON AND NICK FIGHTING. STU, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV IN BG. DEACON: You're not Dracula. NICK: I'm Dracula, man! DEACON: You don't even know who Dracula is, you ignorant... MS DEACON PUSHING NICK. STU, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV IN BG. PAN AS NICK RUNS, JUMPS, TRANSFORMS INTO A BAT AND FLIES AWAY \[FX SHOT\]. PAN AND TILT TO MS DEACON. HE JUMPS, TRANSFORMS INTO A BAT AND FLIES AWAY \[FX SHOT\] AFTER NICK BAT. VLADISLAV \[Off\]: Whoa! WS VIAGO, STU AND VLADISLAV. VLADISLAV: Oh. Bat fight! VIAGO \[ON/OFF\]: Bat fight! Oh! \[Laughs\]. L/A WS BATS FIGHTING IN SKY. PAN. WS VIAGO, STU AND VLADISLAV. BATS FIGHTING IN TOP OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS BATS FLYING. BAT TRANSFORMS BACK TO DEACON. HE LANDS, GRABS BAT AND THROWS IT. PAN AS BAT HITS DOOR, TRANSFORMS INTO NICK AND FALLS TO GROUND. VLADISLAV ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. PAN TO WS VLADISLAV, STU AND DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: Oh, Deacon. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: That wasn't fair, man. NICK: My fuckin' jacket, man. DEACON \[OFF\]: I don't care about your stupid jacket. WS STU, DEACON AND VIAGO. DEACON RUNS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] JUMPS, TRANSFORMS INTO BAT AND FLIES AWAY. TILT UP.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Deacon...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU \[OFF\]: Are you okay, mate? MWS NICK, VLADISLAV AND STU. NICK EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT/INT. TAKEAWAY BAR. NICK EATS CHIP</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS STREET. ZOOM IN TO WS VIAGO, NICK, STU \[BACK TO CAMERA\] AND VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] SEATED AT TABLE. M2S VIAGO AND NICK. WS VIAGO, NICK, VLADISLAV AND STU SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Hey Stu...</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Mmm hmm?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: How's your worms? M2S VIAGO AND NICK. PAN AND TILT TO PLATE OF CHIPS. WS VIAGO, NICK, VLADISLAV AND STU SEATED AT TABLE. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>What?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: You're eating worms. NICK: Can you... do that shit where you turn it into worms? VIAGO: Ah, no. It... VLADISLAV: It doesn't work on chips. Only works on things that already look like worms. M2S VIAGO AND NICK. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: Maybe noodles. Do you want some noodles?</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Great.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: Because he knows now. WS VIAGO, NICK, VLADISLAV AND STU SEATED AT TABLE. NICK EATS CHIP. VLADISLAV: Oh no. I wouldn't eat that.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Why?</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. STREET - NIGHT. NICK VOMITS CHIP</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS NICK VOMITING. ZOOM OUT TO REVEAL VIAGO WATCHING.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Vomits\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK VOMITING. ZOOM OUT TO REVEAL VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND STU WATCHING.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Vomits\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: Are you okay, Nick? WS NICK VOMITING. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO WATCHING.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>All right?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK VOMITING. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[ON/OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Vomits\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO. VLADISLAV IN BG. MS NICK VOMITING. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. PAN AND TILT TO MCU VIAGO. VIAGO: He ate a chip. MS NICK WALKING. TRACK IN AS HE WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. NICK: I can't eat solids now. Great. What, I can't sunbathe, I can't watch daytime TV. I can if I - oh, yeah, I guess I could. MS NICK WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. HE TURNS BACK, THEN WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. MS NICK WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. HE TURNS BACK, THEN WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. NICK: More - more than anything it's just the chips. It's my favourite food. I can't eat chips. NICK: This is - I don't - it's just I hate - I'll say it - I'm over being a vampire. It's shit. So don't - don't believe the hype.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. JACKIE'S HOUSE - NIGHT. DEACON VISITS JACKIE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS SKY. TILT DOWN AS BAT ENTERS TOP OF FRAME. IT HITS POWER LINE AND LANDS ON CAR. ZOOM IN TO WS DEACON ON GROUND BEHIND CAR. HE STANDS. DEACON: \[Sniffs, grunts\]. DEACON \[V/O\]: Jackie! MWS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] JACKIE'S CHILDREN WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. JACKIE AND DEACON \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\] IN FG. DEACON: Jackie, can I come in please? JACKIE: Okay, off to bed guys. DEACON: Hello children. MS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] JACKIE'S HUSBAND AND BABY. JACKIE AND DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN FG. TILT DOWN TO MS CHILDREN. JACKIE AND DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN FG. JACKIE: Don't look at the man. Honey, just don't look. Natasha, don't look at the man. DEACON: Hey, little children. M2S JACKIE AND DEACON \[BACKS TO CAMERA\]. TILT DOWN TO MS JACKIE'S CHILDREN \[THROUGH WINDOW\]. JACKIE \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN FG. M2S JACKIE AND DEACON. DEACON: I was going to bite you tonight. JACKIE: Really? DEACON: But now I can't, because there's this Nick being a vampire. O/S DEACON, JACKIE IN LEFT FG. PAN. JACKIE: So - sorry, I thought, ah, you killed him two months ago, didn't you? DEACON: No. I didn't. No, he's a vampire. JACKIE: What do you mean? DEACON: He jumped in front of your place. M2S JACKIE AND DEACON. O/S JACKIE, DEACON IN RIGHT FG. JACKIE INTERVIEW CU JACKIE'S HAND IRONING SHIRT. TILT UP TO MCU JACKIE. JACKIE: All I'm saying is that, um... you know if I had a penis I would've been - I would've been bitten years ago.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. JACKIE'S HOUSE - NIGHT. DEACON VISITS JACKIE - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>O/S JACKIE, DEACON IN RIGHT FG. ZOOM OUT. DEACON: I may have to penalise you. DEACON: Perhaps another couple of years. Perhaps ten years. Mmm. JACKIE \[V/O, ON\]: Like, one big circle just biting each other's dicks. JACKIE INTERVIEW MCU JACKIE. JACKIE: You know, they don't even wear shirts, they wear blouses. It's just this big homoerotic dick biting club, and I'm stuck here ironing their fuckin' frills. CU BLOUSE IN JACKIE'S HAND. H/A MWS JACKIE IRONING SHIRT.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. JACKIE'S HOUSE - NIGHT. DEACON VISITS JACKIE - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>O/S JACKIE, DEACON IN RIGHT FG. DEACON: Also clean the bathroom please. There's blood everywhere. It is gruesome. M2S JACKIE AND DEACON. JACKIE: \[Breathes heavily\]. O/S JACKIE, DEACON IN RIGHT FG. DEACON EXITS LEFT OF FRAME TO CU JACKIE. PAN AS SHE STARTS TO WALK. DEACON: Okay \[clears throat\]. See you tomorrow. MS JACKIE WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] THROUGH DOORWAY. CHILDREN IN BG. JACKIE: Off to bed please.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. RITA ANGUS RETIREMENT VILLAGE - NIGHT. VIAGO WATCHES</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>KATHERINE - CONTINUED WS STREET. L/A WS KATHERINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN WINDOW. ZOOM OUT TO WS VIAGO FLYING TOWARDS WINDOW.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Katherine... she was so charming and nice. She was everything I wanted. Unfortunately, ja, she was married.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - VIAGO SCANS KATHERINE'S PHOTOGRAPH</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO TAKING PHOTOGRAPH OUT OF LOCKET. MS VIAGO \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] PUTTING PHOTOGRAPH ON SCANNER. MS VIAGO \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] CLOSING LID OF SCANNER. TILT UP TO CU VIAGO. CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF KATHERINE, HUSBAND AND OTHERS ON WEDDING DAY. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Sure I wanted to kill the guy. I thought about chopping his head off, draining him of every drop of blood that he had. Who wouldn't?</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>But then I also saw how happy she was...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] WATCHING PHOTOGRAPH BEING PRINTED.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>...and that made me, kind of, happy.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>H/A CU VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] LOOKING AT PHOTOGRAPH OF KATHERINE. VIAGO \[V/O\]: And I didn't want to ruin it for her. So I did the honourable thing, and I just stepped back, and let her live her life. MS VIAGO AT DESK. TILT UP AND PAN AS HE STANDS AND WALKS. MS VIAGO CLOSING CURTAINS. MWS VIAGO IN COFFIN WITH PHOTOGRAPH OF KATHERINE. HE CLOSES LID. LID BOUNCES. BLACK.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. HOUSE - DAY. ESTABLISHING SHOT</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS SUNRISE. CU HOUSE. TIME LAPSE OF DAY PASSING.</scene_description>
    <character>PETYR \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO \[OFF\]: ...coming from Petyr's room. Run. BLACK.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - DAY. PETYR IS KILLED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MCU DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. HE OPENS DOOR. TRACK IN AND PAN TO MWS VIAGO AND DEACON WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN AS THEY RUN DOWN HALL. PAN TO BLACK.</scene_description>
    <character>PETYR \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Petyr! Petyr!</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Petyr!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO \[OFF\]: Oh, where is it? Petyr!</scene_description>
    <character>PETYR \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>BLACK.:</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Petyr!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>FADE IN MCU VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] TILT DOWN AS HE OPEN HATCH TO H/A WS PETYR ON FIRE. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. TILT UP AND PAN PAST DEACON TO MCU VLADISLAV. HE TURNS AND RUNS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\].</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Petyr!</dialogue>
    <character>PETYR:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Oh! Petyr! Get water! Petyr, get out of the sunlight. Water! Get water! Get water! Petyr, get away from the sunlight. VIAGO: Get in the shadows. Petyr, get out of the sunlight.</scene_description>
    <character>PETYR \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS DEACON. PAN TO MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. HE EXITS LEFT OF FRAME TO H/A WS PETYR ON FIRE. TILT UP AND PAN PAST DEACON TO MS VLADISLAV RUNNING. PAN AS HE RUNS. TILT DOWN TO H/A WS PETYR ON FIRE. VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN LEFT FG. VLADISLAV SPRAYS WATER. VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: \[Screams\]. Get out of my way!</scene_description>
    <character>PETYR \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[OFF\]: I'm going in.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>No.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S VIAGO RESTRAINING DEACON. TILT DOWN AS THEY FALL TO GROUND. DEACON: I'm coming, Petyr. VIAGO: \[Grunts\]. Deacon, no. It's sunlight. DEACON: I'm coming for you. VIAGO \[ON/OFF\]: It's sunlight down there. It's sunlight. It's sunlight. MS VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] LOWERING HATCH. TILT UP AS HE STANDS AND TURNS TO MS. PAN AND TILT DOWN TO H/A MS DEACON AND VIAGO ON FLOOR. VLADISLAV: \[Breathes heavily\]. I was too late \[breathes heavily\]. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: \[Breathes heavily\]. WS VLADISLAV. VIAGO AND DEACON ON FLOOR. TRACK BACK. VIAGO: \[Sobs\]. VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: Turn that thing off. WS VLADISLAV WALKING PAST VIAGO AND DEACON ON FLOOR. TRACK BACK AS VLADISLAV WALKS TO MCU. HE PLACES HAND OVER CAMERA. VLADISLAV: Our friend has just been killed in a fatal sunlight accident. BLACK.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. WELLINGTON - DAY TO NIGHT. ESTABLISHING SHOT</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>FADE IN WS WELLINGTON CITY. TIME LAPSE DAY TURNING TO NIGHT.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. PETYR'S ROOM - NIGHT. DEACON AND VLADISLAV INVESTIGATE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>PETYR'S DEATH CU STAKE IN DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER'S HAND. TILT UP TO MS DEACON. TILT UP TO WINDOW AND DOWN TO CHARRED REMAINS OF PETYR ON FLOOR, AS DEACON STEPS OVER HIM. TILT UP TO MS DEACON. VLADISLAV \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV. TILT DOWN AS VLADISLAV'S HAND MOVES VAMPIRE HUNTER'S JACKET. TILT UP TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON. DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: So this is what I think happened. The Vampire Hunter has broken through the window here... has impacted the table, breaking the table leg. Then he has come this way... towards the tomb \[gag\]. Crucifix \[gags\] Cover the crucifix \[gags\]. VLADISLAV: \[Gags\]. DEACON: And then... Petyr has burst from the tomb, pushed the tomb lid onto the Vampire Hunter, and then the sunlight has come through there, and burnt Petyr alive. MWS STAIRCASE. PAN TO CU PETYR'S TOMB. TILT DOWN TO CU TOMB LID. DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. TILT DOWN TO H/A MS DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER ON FLOOR. H/A MS DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER ON FLOOR. VLADISLAV \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] STEPPING OVER HIM. PAN AND TILT TO MWS DEACON. TILT DOWN AND ZOOM IN TO CHARRED REMAINS OF PETYR. VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: I think this is just a table leg, which is... sanded down. Do you think he hand sanded that or...? H/A MS DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER ON FLOOR. VLADISLAV \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] PICKS TO STAKE. DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN RIGHT OF FRAME. MCU VLADISLAV HOLDING STAKE. MS DEACON. ZOOM OUT TO M2S VLADISLAV AND DEACON LOOKING AT STAKES. DEACON: Yes. Imagine that stuck in your... VLADISLAV: It's a leg. VLADISLAV: Oh. L/A MS NICK \[BACK TO CAMERA\] WALKING DOWN STEPS. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: It's quite shocking down here, Nick. Look, here's our sweet Petyr... burnt to a sizzle. MS VIAGO. NICK \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN LEFT OF FRAME. TILT DOWN TO H/A MS CHARRED REMAINS OF PETYR. VIAGO AND DEACON \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. PAN AND TILT UP M2S NICK AND VIAGO. ZOOM OUT AND TILT DOWN TO MWS VLADISLAV AND VIAGO BESIDE DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER ON FLOOR. ZOOM IN TO CU DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER AS VLADISLAV TWISTS HIS HEAD. ZOOM IN TO ECU HAND. NICK \[OFF\]: Oh, fuck. Yeah. VLADISLAV: I can't figure out this. Is - is this his front or his back? VIAGO: This is the Vampire Hunter. NICK: Oh, who is this guy?</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Look at his bloody head on back-to- front. Twist it the other way, the other way.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: You don't... VLADISLAV: Oh, this way. VIAGO: See who this guy is here.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ECU VLADISLAV'S HAND. ZOOM OUT TO H/A CU DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO'S HANDS ON HIS HEAD. VLADISLAV: Mmm. Typical macho type.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Yuk.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Hideous.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh shit.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAN AND TILT UP TO MCU NICK. ZOOM OUT. NICK: I know that guy actually. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: You know him?</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>What?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO. PAN TO MCU NICK. PAN TO MCU VLADISLAV. PAN TO MCU NICK. PAN TO MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. DEACON ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. PAN AND TILT AS HE STARTS TO CLIMB STAIRS. NICK'S LEGS EXIT LEFT OF FRAME. NICK: I saw him the other night in town... told him I was a vampire.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>What?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: I thought he was joking, he said he was a vampire hunter. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: You let a vampire hunter into our house? NICK: I didn't let him in. I just gave him my e-mail. He didn't...</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Nick!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: I will tear out your tongue and shove it down your arse.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Deacon...</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Snarls\].</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT. DEACON ATTACKS NICK</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>NICK CLEARS RIGHT OF FRAME TO MS DEACON RUNNING. PAN TO MS DEACON RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. DEACON: \[Snarls\] I'm going to kill you. MCU DEACON RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. PAN AND TILT UP TO L/A WS NICK CLIMBING STAIRS. TILT DOWN TO MS DEACON CLIMBING STAIRS. TRACK IN AND PAN. MS DEACON. HE EXITS LEFT OF FRAME. PAN AROUND CORNER AND TILT DOWN TO H/A MS NICK AND DEACON ON FLOOR. THEY START TO FIGHT AND CLIMB WALLS.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: Tear out your tongue. WS NICK AND DEACON FIGHTING ON CEILING. ZOOM IN. DEACON: Kill Petyr with your big mouth.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK AND DEACON FIGHTING ON CEILING. WS NICK AND DEACON ON CEILING. NICK: It was a mistake.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Get up.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: Take a breath. DEACON: Get up and stand on the ceiling like a man. WS NICK AND DEACON FIGHTING ON CEILING.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK AND DEACON FIGHTING ON WALL. NICK STARTS TO EXIT FRAME THROUGH DOORWAY.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. THERE IS A KNOCK AT THE DOOR</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV RESTRAINING DEACON. STU IN BG. DEACON: \[Hisses, growl\]. MWS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV RESTRAINING DEACON. PAN TO L/A WS NICK IN CORNER OF CEILING. NICK: We can talk about this, okay? We can talk about it. MWS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV RESTRAINING DEACON. PAN TO L/A WS NICK IN CORNER OF CEILING. DEACON: I'm going to kill you \[growls, hisses\]. NICK: I'm already dead. H/A MS VIAGO ON TABLE. DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN MID-AIR. VLADISLAV HOLDING HIS LEG. STU \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS DEACON. NICK IN BG. NICK: Stu stay back. MS DEACON IN MID-AIR. PAN AND ZOOM IN TO MS STU, DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN RIGHT FG.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK IN CORNER OF CEILING. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: Shh. Shh. Shh. Shh. MWS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV RESTRAINING DEACON \[IN MID-AIR\]. STU IN BG. VIAGO: There's someone at the door. VIAGO: I'll go. I'll go. CU VIAGO. DEACON AND VLADISLAV IN BG. PAN AS VIAGO WALK. HE EXITS LEFT OF FRAME THROUGH DOORWAY. H/A MS VLADISLAV HOLDING DEACON'S LEGS. TILT DOWN.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. ENTRANCE HALL - NIGHT. VISIT FROM THE POLICE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>H/A WS VIAGO RUNNING TO DOOR. ZOOM IN. VIAGO OPENS DOOR TO MWS POLICEWOMAN AND POLICEMAN, VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh shit.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN: Yeah, good evening, sir. VIAGO: Hello Police. POLICEWOMAN: Hi, um, I'm Constable O'Leary. This is Constable Minogue. We're just responding to reports of a, um, a possible forced entry, and also a rather large amount of shrieking. Just, um, wondering if maybe we could come in. Just have a wee look around. MWS POLICEWOMAN AND POLICEMAN WALKING THROUGH DOORWAY, VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. PAN TO M2S POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN: What's with the - hello - what's with the, um, camera. POLICEWOMAN \[V/O, ON\]: Yeah, obviously we're just here, because, um, there was a phone call from the - a member of the public, um, about a bit of a disturbance. POLICEWOMAN \[V/O, ON\]: Um, some loud noises, possibly a forced entry, wasn't there? MCU POLICEWOMAN. ZOOM OUT TO M2S POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Mmm.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN: And, um, and also maybe a bit of smoke coming out. So we're just checking over the scene, making sure everything is, um, you know, above board, so to speak. And, ah, making sure no one is in danger. That kind of thing. MWS VIAGO, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. VIAGO EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME. PAN AS POLICEWOMAN AND POLICEMAN WALK. PAN AROUND TO MWS POLICEMAN, POLICEWOMAN AND VIAGO ON STAIRS. POLICEWOMAN: We might go and have a wee look up there, if that's all right with you. Just, you know, part of the job. POLICEMAN: Come on mate. You lead the way.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Yep.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\]. Okay.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEMAN: Smells a bit weird in here too, mate.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEMAN: What do you call that?</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Barbecue.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>L/A MWS POLICEMAN, POLICEWOMAN AND VIAGO CLIMBING STAIRS. VIAGO TURNS. VIAGO: You will not notice anything out of the ordinary.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN: No, we - we certainly hope not. Let's just - let's just keep going.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN \[V/O, ON\]: Yeah, hi there, guys.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. POLICE HAVE A LOOK AROUND</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>TILT UP AS POLICEWOMAN WALKS INTO KITCHEN TO MWS VIAGO AND DEACON \[IN MID-AIR\]. POLICEMAN ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. PAN AND TILT UP TO L/A MWS DEACON \[IN MID-AIR\] AND NICK \[IN CORNER OF CEILING\]</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Hello.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN: How are you?</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Good.</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Hey fellas.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Hello.</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Um, is this the, ah, the room we've heard all the shouting coming from?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>That was me.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS POLICEWOMAN. PAN AND TILT DOWN TO MS VLADISLAV ON FLOOR, HOLDING DEACON'S LEGS. PAN AND TILT UP TO PROFILE CU POLICEMAN.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, okay. We've had a couple of reports, okay. There's a couple of people not that happy about the level of noise here.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay. The neighbours?</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>You can't keep screaming when</dialogue>
    <scene_description>there's this many people around, mate. You've got neighbours on either side. CU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[ON/OFF, WHISPERS\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Really nervous. I've hypnotised those cops. I'm not a great hypnotizer, so it could wear off any second.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[ON/OFF, WHISPERS\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I really hope that those guys don't kill those police, because it will mean more police will come, possibly even Christians, which is totally the last thing we need in this house.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Which neighbours complained?</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, all right.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS DEACON \[IN MID-AIR\] POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN \[BACKS TO CAMERA\] IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Just try and keep the noise down, okay? All right.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICE OFFICER \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Indistinct\].</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I can see you're having a good</dialogue>
    <scene_description>time. End of the day, we've got to keep the, ah, the peace, okay? M2S POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. ZOOM IN TO MCU POLICEMAN. PAN AROUND TO L/A MWS NICK IN CORNER OF CEILING. DEACON IN BOTTOM OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Whoa whoa whoa.</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>See what I'm seeing?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]: What's that, Minogue? POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]: You're joking. MS VIAGO. DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN BG. POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]: Not a smoke alarm in sight. L/A MWS NICK IN CORNER OF CEILING. DEACON IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. POLICEMAN \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN LEFT FG. TILT DOWN TO MS VLADISLAV ON FLOOR, HOLDING DEACON'S LEGS. POLICEMAN: No smoke detectors, mate. Rule Number One, smoke detectors. VLADISLAV: Okay. POLICEWOMAN \[OFF/ON\]: Rule Number Two, maybe not so many barbecues inside. M2S POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. L/A MWS NICK IN CORNER OF CEILING. DEACON IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. POLICEMAN \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN LEFT FG. TILT DOWN AS POLICEMAN EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME TO MS VLADISLAV ON FLOOR, HOLDING DEACON'S LEGS. POLICEWOMAN ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. POLICEMAN: Sort it out, fellas. DEACON: Okay. POLICEMAN \[V/O, ON\]: Barbette smells really strong down here, doesn't it? POLICEMAN \[V/O, ON\]: What kind of marinade - what kind of marinade did you use?</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. PETYR'S ROOM - NIGHT. POLICE LOOK AROUND PETYR'S ROOM</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>H/A MS POLICEMAN AND VIAGO. POLICEWOMAN ENTERS BOTTOM OF FRAME \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. VIAGO: Yeah. No, this is... POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]: Who is this guy? MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEWOMAN AND POLICEMAN. POLICEWOMAN STARTS TO EXIT BOTTOM OF FRAME. VIAGO: Oh. VLADISLAV \[ON/OFF\]: Um, that's a friend who came to our party. H/A MWS POLICEWOMAN BESIDE DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER. POLICEWOMAN: Mate, are you right? VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: He's drunk. MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, DEACON AND POLICEMAN. POLICEWOMAN IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. ZOOM IN. POLICEMAN: That's what I thought. He's - yeah... VLADISLAV: Drunk guy. POLICEWOMAN \[OFF/ON\]: Look, you can't just leave him here like that. Okay? This guy is not having a good time. He's going to feel terrible tomorrow morning. MCU POLICEWOMAN. POLICEMAN IN BG. M2S VIAGO AND DEACON. MS VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. PAN. VIAGO: Mmm. DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: Well, his soul is in hell. So don't worry. MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. POLICEWOMAN: Well, I don't know where his soul is, but all I'm saying is, where is his blanket? Okay, just check on him in the morning. H/A MCU DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER. POLICEMAN \[OFF/ON\]: There's a big slab of concrete on him. MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. VIAGO: Yeah. TILT DOWN TO CU TOMB DOOR ON DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Could move that.</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Well, I mean, that - that's not definitely not going to be comfortable. Anything else in here, Minogue?</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>He likes it.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>No, I think I've seen enough.</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay.</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Hang on a minute.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>What have we got here?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU DEACON. H/A MS CHARRED REMAINS OF PETYR ON FLOOR. VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\]. TILT UP TO MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, what is that?</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>This?</dialogue>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>This.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh this.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEMAN \[ON/OFF\]: You can see it as clearly as I can. Adhesive, mate. That's a flammable. H/A MS BUCKETS BESIDE CHARRED REMAINS OF PETYR ON FLOOR. VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\]. POLICEMAN'S HAND POINTS TO BUCKETS. TILT UP TO MS VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND DEACON. POLICEMAN'S HAND POINTING TO POWER SOURCE.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEMAN \[OFF\]: Then you've got a lamp on top of that, directly underneath a power source.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Gee.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Oh. That is quite bad, guys. MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. POLICEMAN: It's very bad. POLICEWOMAN: It's a very bad combination. POLICEMAN: And no smoke detectors again, are there? VIAGO: No. POLICEWOMAN: No. VLADISLAV: Yes, there are. DEACON: Yes. POLICEMAN: Yes, there are. I see them, yeah. That's good. POLICEWOMAN: Okay, there are. MS DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. PAN. VIAGO \[OFF\]: Lots to think about, guys. POLICEWOMAN: Okay. Yeah, lots to think about. Well, shall we carry on? VIAGO \[OFF\]: Next flat meeting. Ja? MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, DEACON, POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN. POLICEMAN AND POLICEWOMAN STARTS TO CLIMB STAIRS. TILT DOWN TO CU DEAD VAMPIRE HUNTER ON GROUND. POLICEWOMAN: Yeah, good - yeah, good thinking. That's the thing. POLICEWOMAN: Just have a bit of dialogue about it. DEACON: Yes. VIAGO: Okay. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Okay. They've got a really good point. MS VLADISLAV, VIAGO AND DEACON. ZOOM IN TO MCU DEACON. VIAGO IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. TILT UP AS HE STARTS TO CLIMB STAIRS. DEACON: Wait. Let's kill them. VIAGO: No. VLADISLAV: Well, let's just see just see what other safety points they have, and then maybe we'll kill them.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. THE TRIAL OF NICK OF WELLINGTON</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MWS NICK. PAINTINGS OF VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO ON WALL IN BG. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO. MWS NICK. PAINTINGS OF VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO ON WALL IN BG. DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: I call into session this trial of Nick of Wellington. MS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO. WS NICK, STU, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO. VIAGO SITS. DEACON WALKS AROUND HIM. VIAGO: \[Clears throat\]. WS NICK SEATED IN CHAIR. STU SEATED IN BG. ZOOM IN TO MS NICK. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: Read the charges. MS VIAGO SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV AND DEACON \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. VIAGO \[ON/OFF\]: Problems we have with Nick... Number One... you brought a human into our house, which is a big no- no in the vampire world. MWS STU. NICK IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV AND VIAGO \[SEATED\], DEACON IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. ZOOM OUT TO MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO \[SEATED\] AND DEACON. VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: Stu - Stu is okay, though.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah. So Stu is fine. So we'll - I guess we'll just cross that one out. Ah...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAN TO MS STU HOLDING OUT PEN. TILT DOWN AS VIAGO TAKES PEN. TILT UP TO MCU VLADISLAV. DEACON IN RIGHT FG. VIAGO \[OFF\]: Thank you, Stu.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Thank you, Stu.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>So... the new Number One, Nick has been telling people he's a vampire. That in turn resulted in... an unwanted visit from a Vampire Hunter. Crime Number Two - this is quite a biggie, Nick. The Vampire Hunter who killed Petyr.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK, STU, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO. MS STU. DEACON IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. WS NICK, STU, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO. MS NICK. MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO \[SEATED\] AND DEACON. MS NICK. STU IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Um...</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>That's a - that actually should've</dialogue>
    <scene_description>- that should've been Crime Number One. But we wanted to build up to that. MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO \[SEATED\] AND DEACON. MS NICK. STU IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Number Three, Deacon doesn't like that you wear the same jackets as him, and he would like you to find your own original style.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO \[SEATED\] AND DEACON. MS NICK. ZOOM OUT.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>For these crimes of which, we the Vampire Council find you guilty, you should be banished from our flat indefinitely.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO \[SEATED\] AND DEACON. MCU NICK. WS NICK, STU, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Indefinitely.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Indefinitely.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK AND STU. DEACON IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. ZOOM IN TO MCU NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>So I can come back... one day.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>No, no. Indefinitely means there is no end.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO \[SEATED\] AND DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>I thought it was like...</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[ON/OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I just think it... No, indefinite means that's it not a definite thing, it can be changed.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>No.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VLADISLAV, VIAGO \[SEATED\] AND DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Does it though?</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes, but it's long.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>It could be tomorrow, it could be six months.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>No, it is not tomorrow.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>No, it won't be tomorrow.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>No. No.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK, STU, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Forget about it. You're banished.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>It's at least six months.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: You're banished. But Stu, you can visit if you like.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>That's it.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS STU NICK IN LEFT FG. PAN AND TILT UP AS NICK LEANS FORWARD. PAN AND TILT AS NICK LEANS BACK.</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Thank you.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[OFF\]: For your crimes... you will be made to suffer... the Procession of Shame. PROFILE CU DEACON. VLADISLAV IN BG. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO. VIAGO: I asked them, Nick. I asked them not to pass that sentence. PROFILE CU DEACON. VLADISLAV IN BG. DEACON: We should do this immediately, in my opinion. VLADISLAV: You didn't ask. You didn't ask. You were saying, yes. MWS VLADISLAV, DEACON AND VIAGO. ZOOM OUT. VIAGO: \[Breathes heavily\]. VIAGO: I didn't. Well I - I still think it's quite extreme. DEACON: Well, this is what's going to happen... PROFILE CU DEACON. VLADISLAV IN BG. DEACON: Let us do the Procession of Shame... now. WS NICK SEATED IN CHAIR. VLADISLAV \[V/O\]: Shame! DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: Shame! Shame! Shame!</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. HOUSE - NIGHT. THE PROCESSION OF SHAME</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS DEACON, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV WALKING AROUND NICK. STU IN BG. VIAGO: Shame! Shame! Shame! VLADISLAV: Shame! MS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV WALKING AROUND NICK. DEACON ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME IN BG. VLADISLAV: Shame! VIAGO: Bad Vampire! WS NICK, VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV. STU IN BG. PAN AS NICK AND STU WALK. DEACON: Shame! NICK: Shall we go, Stu? VIAGO \[Whispers\]: Bye Stu. MWS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV. ZOOM IN TO MCU VIAGO. WS NICK AND STU AT GATE. ZOOM IN TO MS NICK. STU EXITS FRAME IN BG. M2S VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV. PAN AS THEY WALK. WS VIAGO, DEACON AND VLADISLAV WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] THROUGH GATE. VLADISLAV: That was a shame.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. BATHROOM - NIGHT. JACKIE CLEANS THE BATHROOM</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CU JACKIE'S GLOVED HANDS WIPING BLOOD FROM FLOOR. H/A WS JACKIE WIPING BLOOD FROM FLOOR. SHE SITS AND LOOKS AROUND. FADE TO BLACK. JACKIE: \[Sighs\] BLACK.: TITLE: Several Months Later BLACK.: DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: So today we have the invitation... to the big event of the year.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sighs\].</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. HOUSE - NIGHT. ESTABLISHING SHOT</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>FADE IN MS HOUSE. VIAGO \[V/O\]: ...to the... VIAGO \[V/O\]: Breaking it open.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. UNHOLY MASQUERADE INVITATION</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CU VIAGO'S HANDS OPENING ENVELOPE. TILT UP AS HE LIFTS ENVELOPE UP. DEACON \[OFF\]: They have burnt the edges. VIAGO \[OFF\]: Like a treasure map or something. CU VIAGO'S HANDS TAKING INVITATION OUT OF ENVELOPE. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: It looks very authentic, doesn't it? MWS VIAGO AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV IN BG. VIAGO: "Dearly departed..." That's us \[laughs\]. "The Wellington Vampire Association in conjunction with the Lower Hutt Vampire Witch Club and the Karori Zombie Society invites you to attend the Unholy Masquerade on the night of the 6th of June. Starting at six PM." CU INVITATION IN VIAGO'S HANDS. TILT DOWN. MWS VIAGO AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV IN BG. VIAGO: Six six six.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: There's only two sixes. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: The Unholy Masquerade, of course, is a great time for the undead community of Wellington. There's zombies there, vampires, banshees, all having a dance together. It's always a big deal for me. VLADISLAV INTERVIEW MCU VLADISLAV. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF PETYR HOLDING MASK. PAN TO CU PAINTING OF WOMAN. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF DEACON \[IN MID-AIR\] VLADISLAV IN FG. OTHERS IN BG. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF DEACON, VLADISLAV AND VIAGO. ZOOM OUT. MS VLADISLAV.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Love it.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>One year I went to the Unholy Masquerade dressed as Whoopi Goldberg from, ah, Sister Act I and Sister Act II Back in the Habit. It didn't go down so well because she was a nun \[laughs\]. We - vampires don't like nuns.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON and VIAGO INTERVIEW MWS DEACON AND VIAGO. MCU VIAGO. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VIAGO DRESSED AS NUN. MWS DEACON AND VIAGO. VLADISLAV INTERVIEW MCU VLADISLAV HOLDING UP MASK.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Of course the big deal of the Unholy Masquerade is every year they announce a Guest of Honour, and, um, I don't know if I should be saying this, but... I heard a little rumour that the Guest of Honour this year... might be me.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VLADISLAV WEARING MASK. MS VLADISLAV WEARING MASK. MS VLADISLAV WEARING MASK.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VLADISLAV.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT. UNHOLY MASQUERADE INVITATION -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED CU VIAGO. ZOOM OUT TO M2S VIAGO AND DEACON. DEACON: The location... VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: Oh where - yeah, where is it? VIAGO: Oh the, um... DEACON: Oh the, um, the - the Cathedral of Despair. VIAGO: Oh, the location... CU VIAGO. DEACON IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. VIAGO: And the Guest of Honour will be... MWS VIAGO AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV IN BG. VIAGO HANDS INVITATION TO VLADISLAV.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Who is it? Show me.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU VLADISLAV READING INVITATION.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Breathes heavily\]. Mmm.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VIAGO AND DEACON SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV IN BG. VLADISLAV EXITS LEFT OF FRAME. TILT DOWN AND ZOOM IN TO H/A M2S VIAGO AND DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Breathes heavily\]. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay, that's fine. That's fine.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Okay?</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I can't believe it!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>H/A M2S VIAGO AND DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Ah, Vladislav has... just had a reaction to the information that the Guest of Honour will be, um, The Beast.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>No! \[Screams, shouts et cetera\]</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU VIAGO. CU PHOTOGRAPH OF CREATURE. VLADISLAV INTERVIEW H/A MCU VLADISLAV IN COFFIN. VLADISLAV: The darkest part of my mind is reserved for The Beast. DEACON and VIAGO INTERVIEW MWS DEACON AND VIAGO. VIAGO: We could tell you a thing or two about The Beast. M2S VLADISLAV AND STU SEATED AT TABLE. VLADISLAV: You should pray that you never have to see The Beast. MS VLADISLAV WITH DRAWING OF BEAST. VLADISLAV: This one is called The Beast. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: And I said, "Get your hands off my balls, Beast!" M2S WOMAN AND VLADISLAV. MWS DEACON AND VIAGO. DEACON: He may have told you some stories about his great battle with The Beast. VIAGO \[ON/OFF\]: Yeah. "Oh, I fought The Beast on a cliff." "Oh, I fought The Beast in a swamp." MCU DEACON. PAN TO MCU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Mmm. Or he...</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>"And then one time I fought The Beast in the toilets of a nightclub."</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS DEACON AND VIAGO. MS DEACON. VIAGO IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Difficult battle.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV INTERVIEW H/A MWS VLADISLAV IN COFFIN.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>I hope you never see The Beast.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>H/A MCU VLADISLAV IN COFFIN.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>The Beast...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU DRAWING OF CREATURE. ECU DRAWING OF CREATURE.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. HOUSE - NIGHT. ESTABLISHING SHOT</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS HOUSE.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. GETTING READY FOR THE UNHOLY MASQUERADE</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO IN COSTUME. DEACON IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN BG. ZOOM OUT. DEACON: You can't go to the ball as Blade. He's a vampire hunter. O/S DEACON, VIAGO IN RIGHT FG. VIAGO \[OFF\]: Yeah, but vampires love Wesley Snipes, so it's... DEACON \[ON/OFF\]: No, it's inappropriate. Okay Vlad, the green jodhpurs, or the black leather with the dragon belt? I'm having a male crisis here. O/S VIAGO, DEACON IN LEFT FG. PAN TO MS VIAGO. TILT DOWN. MS DEACON \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] HOLDING TROUSERS. TILT UP TO MS DEACON. M2S DEACON AND VIAGO WITH TROUSERS. VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN BG. VLADISLAV: Just wear the pants you're going to wear - which wants do you want to wear? VIAGO: Just look at the pants, Vlad. Turn around and look at them. DEACON: Look at the pants. Look at the pants. VLADISLAV: They're just pants.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Shit, man!</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Holy shit!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S DEACON AND VIAGO WITH TROUSERS. VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN BG. ZOOM OUT TO MS VLADISLAV \[AGED\]. PAN TO MCU VLADISLAV \[AGED\]. VIAGO \[OFF\]: Oh, you look terrible. VLADISLAV: The black pants. WS VLADISLAV \[AGED\] DEACON AND VIAGO IN FG. DEACON: Thank you. Get dressed. VLADISLAV: I don't know if I feel up to it really. O/S VLADISLAV \[AGED\], DEACON IN LEFT FG. VIAGO \[OFF\]: You don't look that great, but if you eat someone on the way, and rejuvenate a little bit... MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV \[AGED\] AND VIAGO. VLADISLAV: I'm fine. I just... O/S VLADISLAV \[AGED\], VIAGO IN RIGHT FG. PAN AND TILT TO CU DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>You could probably wear a mask or something.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV \[OFF/ON\]: You leave me to do my dark bidding on the Internet. CU VLADISLAV \[AGED\]. MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV \[AGED\] AND VIAGO. VIAGO: What are you bidding on? VLADISLAV: I'm bidding on a table. MWS DEACON, VLADISLAV \[AGED\] AND VIAGO. VIAGO: Are you coming or not?</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Not.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: All right. I'm gonna go change. We're leaving in ten minutes. MWS DEACON AND VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. DEACON EXITS LEFT OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sighs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: Have a good time.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT/INT. THE CATHEDRAL OF DESPAIR - NIGHT. THE UNHOLY</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MASQUERADE WS BALL ATTENDEES WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TOWARDS VENUE. FADE IN TITLE \[SUPERED\]: The Cathedral of Despair BALL ATTENDEES \[OFF/ON\]: \[General chatter\]. MS VIAGO AND DEACON WALKING. TRACK IN AS THEY WALK INTO VENUE TO WS BALL ATTENDEES. MWS VAMPIRE WITCH, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VAMPIRE WITCH: Hello \[laughs\]. DEACON: Great! M2S CHILD VAMPIRES. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. CU ZOMBIE. OTHER ZOMBIE IN BG. WS MORANA \[IN MID-AIR\] AND BALL ATTENDEES DANCING. M2S ZOMBIE AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM IN TO MCU ZOMBIE. ZOMBIE: We - we tend to often, you know, without getting into that, kind of \[makes zombie noise\] stuff, which I'm really sick of that. But, you know, it - it's just - it's harder for us to actually chase people down. ZOMBIE: Can I - can I introduce, um, ah, Gary - Gary and Alicia? They're - they're, um... BALL ATTENDEES CLEARS LEFT FG TO O/S VIAGO, ZOMBIE IN LEFT FG.</scene_description>
    <character>ZOMBIE GARY \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS ZOMBIES AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VIAGO: Hi. How are you? ZOMBIE: They're - hi, there \[stutters\]. Less groaning. Less groaning guys.</scene_description>
    <character>ZOMBIE GARY:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Groans\]</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Hi, how it going? Yeah. CU BANNER "WVS AND LHVWC WELCOMES YOU TO THE UNHOLY MASQUERADE". TILT DOWN TO WS BALL ATTENDEES. DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: So we're at the Unholy Masquerade. It's great. This is my mask... CU DEACON. JACKIE IN BG. DEACON TURNS TO O/S JACKIE, DEACON IN LEFT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. DEACON: ...which I made for the occasion. JACKIE: Ah! \[Laughs\]. Yeah \[laughs\]. DEACON: Hey... Jackie. DEACON: This undead party. JACKIE: \[Laughs\]. Yeah, I'm a vampire. DEACON: You'll have your... JACKIE: I'm a vampire. M2S DEACON AND JACKIE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Now...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>JACKIE: I'm a vampire \[laughs\]. Yeah, yeah.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Great.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S DEACON AND JACKIE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. DEACON: So, um, who bit you?</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh, Nick.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh great.</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON \[ON/OFF\]: Right, okay. PAN TO MWS NICK AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Deacon!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS DEACON, VIAGO AND NICK. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. DEACON: It's pretty rude because she was my servant. MCU VIAGO. NICK IN RIGHT FG. PAN TO CU DEACON. VIAGO IN BG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VIAGO: She was a pretty useless servant. I wouldn't worry about it. DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: Yes, but, ah, still. I would've been - appreciated if you had asked... unlike some of these people. MS DEACON AND VIAGO. NICK IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>How's Stu?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS DEACON, VIAGO AND NICK. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN AND PULL FOCUS TO WS STU. DEACON AND VIAGO IN FG. NICK: Stu's good. He's there. VIAGO: Oh, he's here.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu!</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]: Hi! How are you? DEACON \[V/O, ON\]: Hey \[laughs\]. Hey \[laughs\]. MWS STU, VIAGO AND DEACON. THEY EMBRACE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. STU: Nice to see you. \[Laughs\]. Group hug \[laughs\].</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh! Yes.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>BALL ATTENDEES CLEARS LEFT OF FRAME TO MS NICK, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN TO M2S VIAGO AND STU. DEACON: Has anyone looked at you like they want to eat you at all?</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Ah, no.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO, STU AND DEACON. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VAMPIRE WITCH \[OFF\]: Can you hear me at the back? WS BALL ATTENDEES. VAMPIRE WITCH \[OFF/ON\]: On behalf of the Wellington Vampire Society, ah, the Lower Hutt Vampire and Witch Club, and the Karori Zombie Society, ah, we welcome you here tonight. We're raffling a live meat pack this year. Ah, you can inspect the prize over here to my left. It's a wonderful prize. Tickets are only $10 each, or $45 for a book of five. WS VAMPIRE WITCH AT MICROPHONE. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. MS BALL ATTENDEES. MS BALL ATTENDEE. OTHERS IN BG. WS VAMPIRE WITCH AT MICROPHONE. VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. ZOOM IN. M2S ZOMBIES. PAN TO M2S ZOMBIES. M2S PAULINE AND JULIAN. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. MCU VAMPIRE WITCH AT MICROPHONE. JULIAN AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN. MS MAN IN CAGE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>BALL ATTENDEES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Murmur\].</dialogue>
    <character>MAN IN CAGE:</character>
    <dialogue>No...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS MAN IN CAGE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG. VAMPIRE WITCH \[OFF/ON\]: Now without further ado, it's my very great pleasure to introduce to you this year's Guest of Honour... Pauline Ivanovich. MS VAMPIRE WITCH AT MICROPHONE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG. MS BALL ATTENDEES. NICK IN FG. MS JACKIE, MORANA AND BALL ATTENDEES. WS VAMPIRE WITCH AT MICROPHONE. VIAGO AND DEACON \[BACKS TO CAMERA\] IN FG. MS VAMPIRE WITCH AT MICROPHONE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG. VAMPIRE WITCH EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME, AS PAULINE ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. JULIAN ENTER RIGHT OF FRAME IN BG. BALL ATTENDEES: \[Cheer, et cetera\].</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Thank you.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAULINE: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. WS PAULINE AND JULIAN ON STAGE. VIAGO AND DEACON IN FG. VIAGO: That's The Beast. VLADISLAV INTERVIEW MS VLADISLAV \[AGED\]. VLADISLAV: The Beast is, ah, the name I give to my ex-girlfriend, Pauline. She prefers Pauline. We had a very intense relationship. We were very sexually explosive. MCU VLADISLAV \[AGED\]. CU BLACK AND WHITE DRAWING OF WOMAN SEATED ON MAN'S BACK. ZOOM IN. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: Last time I saw her she impaled me, and called me an arsehole. She said... all kinds of things that really hurt me, and all this while I was impaled on a lamppost. CU BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV AND PAULINE. ZOOM IN. MCU VLADISLAV. MS VLADISLAV. PAULINE \[V/O\]: Well everyone, I will be mingling around, and I really hope that I will meet... all of you.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. THE CATHEDRAL OF DESPAIR - NIGHT. THE UNHOLY MASQUERADE -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED M2S PAULINE AND JULIAN AT MICROPHONE. WS PAULINE AND JULIAN ON STAGE. VIAGO IN FG. BALL ATTENDEES: \[Laugh, general chatter\]. CU FOOD TABLE. MS BALL ATTENDEE, VIAGO AND NICK. CU BALL ATTENDEE. WS STU, VIAGO AND BALL ATTENDEES DANCING. WS STU, NICK AND BALL ATTENDEES DANCING. PAN TO WS MIRROR. IN REFLECTION ZOMBIE AND STU DANCING. MS PAULINE AND BALL ATTENDEES. PAN AS SHE WALKS.</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Hello...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO \[OFF\]: That's her new guy. Do you know what - what kind of vampire he is - if he is a vampire? MS JULIAN AND PAULINE. JACKIE AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. BALL ATTENDEE CLEARS RIGHT FG TO MCU JULIAN. DEACON \[OFF\]: Did you see his face? MS PAULINE, MORANA AND JACKIE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Hello. Oh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU STU DANCING, PAULINE IN BG. PAN AS PAULINE WALKS TO MS PAULINE. DEACON AND VIAGO IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE: Oh, oh. Hello. VIAGO: Hi. How are you? MWS PAULINE, JULIAN, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VIAGO: This is Deacon. M2S PAULINE AND JULIAN. PAN TO MS PAULINE, JULIAN, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE: Hello Deacon. MWS STU, PAULINE, JULIAN, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM IN TO MS STU, PAULINE AND JULIAN. VIAGO: This is Stu, our friend.</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu?</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>JULIAN: G'day, Stu. How are you, mate? PAULINE: \[Gasps\]. Whoa.</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Good, hi.</dialogue>
    <character>JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Julian.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU: Stu. Julian, hello. PAULINE: You've got really warm hands, Stu.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Good.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS STU, PAULINE, JULIAN, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE: Are you - you a demon? VIAGO: No, he's not a demon \[laughs\]. STU: No, no. I'm a software analyst. I... M2S STU AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. MWS STU, PAULINE, JULIAN, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VIAGO: Hey, Stu... Stu... JULIAN: A male witch? You're a male witch. STU: It's, kind of, a technical... VIAGO: Stu... you should go dance, um, with anyone. MS STU AND VIAGO. PAULINE, DEACON AND JULIAN IN BG. PAN. STU EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME. PAN TO MS PAULINE, JULIAN AND VIAGO. STU: Sure. VIAGO: Okay. Take your time. PAULINE: I like Stu. He's not vampire. So he - what - he's a zombie or... MS PAULINE, JULIAN, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. JULIAN: Male witch? M2S PAULINE AND JULIAN. DEACON IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. VIAGO: He's not - he's not a - he's neither. He's, ah, he's more of a human. MS JACKIE AND MORANA \[BACKS TO CAMERA\]. VIAGO CROSSES BG RIGHT TO LEFT. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. VIAGO: Excuse me. Excuse me. Hi. Nick. Hey. Um, Nick... PAN TO MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. NICK IN BG. DEACON AND BALL ATTENDEE IN FG. O/S DEACON AND NICK, VIAGO IN RIGHT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. DEACON: Do you mind if Stu is killed? MS NICK, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. NICK: Ah... I don't feel that good about it. M2S STU AND ZOMBIE. ZOMBIE: Can - can I just ask you a, ah, a, you know, like a - a personal question? Are you - are you, um... STU: Sure. ZOMBIE: \[Sniffs\] are you - are you - are you pre-deceased? MCU ZOMBIE. PAN TO MCU STU. STU: Ah... NICK \[V/O, ON\]: If anyone is going to eat him, it's going to be us. But we're not - we - we - we're past that. They can just go fuck themselves. MS VIAGO, NICK AND DEACON. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. BALL ATTENDEES CLEARS RIGHT FG TO MS DEACON, NICK AND VIAGO. O/S DEACON AND NICK, VIAGO IN RIGHT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. DEACON: Nick, it is your fault, okay? You brought a human into this den of vampiressness. MS VIAGO, NICK AND DEACON. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. NICK: What a plus one. VIAGO: That's not - not helping. Yes, you did. NICK: My plus one. M2S STU AND ZOMBIE. TILT UP AS STU STANDS. HE STARTS TO EXIT RIGHT OF FRAME. STU: Lovely talking to you. I've got to shoot off now. See you later on. ZOMBIE: \[Sniffs, groans\]. MS ZOMBIE. TILT UP AS HE STANDS. ZOOM OUT. VIAGO \[OFF\]: As soon as one vampire takes a bite, it's a... blood frenzy. O/S DEACON AND NICK, VIAGO IN RIGHT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>A frenzy.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO, NICK AND DEACON. NICK: Okay, we've got to get him out. O/S DEACON AND NICK, VIAGO IN RIGHT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VIAGO TURNS. VIAGO: Okay, let's - okay, let's go... DEACON: Follow me. Follow me. MS DEACON, VIAGO AND NICK. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. TRACK BACK AS DEACON WALKS. VIAGO AND NICK FOLLOW. VIAGO: Excuse me. Sorry, guys. M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Okay, Stu. Put that over you bloody red face. MS VIAGO, NICK \[BACK TO CAMERA\] AND DEACON. PAN TO MS STU AND VIAGO. NICK \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN RIGHT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. DEACON \[OFF\]: And pretend you're a vampire. MS STU, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. TRACK AS NICK, STU, DEACON AND VIAGO WALK PAST BALL ATTENDEES DEACON IS STOPPED BY ZOMBIES. DEACON: Just going out. NICK: Going outside for a cigarette.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh, hey.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK, VIAGO, STU AND DEACON \[BACKS TO CAMERA\]. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. THEY TURN. VIAGO: Okay, not that way. Not that way.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Um.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: This way. This way.</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS STU, VIAGO, DEACON AND \[BACKS TO CAMERA\]. ZOMBIE IN FG. PAN AS THEY TURN. VIAGO: Is there another way? Oh. DEACON: Not - not this way. MS VIAGO, STU AND DEACON. ZOMBIE IN FG. PAN TO MWS NICK, VIAGO, STU AND DEACON. ZOMBIE WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TOWARDS THEM. DEACON: Back away from the vampires.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Guys...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAULINE \[OFF/ON\]: Excuse me everyone. Can I have your attention please? PAN TO M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Shh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK, DEACON, STU AND VIAGO IN CIRCLE OF BALL ATTENDEES. PAULINE WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TOWARDS THEM. PAULINE: Some of the vampires forget Unholy Masquerade rules. They brought a human. MS PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. PAN AS SHE WALKS. MWS DEACON, NICK, STU AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. ZOOM OUT. MS PAULINE WALKING. PAN AS SHE WALKS TO NICK, STU, DEACON AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN TO MS PAULINE. JULIAN AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. BALL ATTENDEES \[OFF/ON\]: \[Murmur, hiss\] PAULINE: And they don't let us to feast on him \[laughs\]. MWS NICK, DEACON, STU AND VIAGO. VAMPIRE WITCH, MORANA, JACKIE AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM IN AND PAN. VIAGO: This is a total misunderstanding. There was - on the invitation - and this actually pertains to you. The invitation - it said, plus one. But it did not specify it could be a human, or if it could be a werewolf... MS VIAGO. STU AND DEACON \[BACKS TO CAMERA\] IN FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Plus one.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE: Hey mate. Look... PAN TO M2S VIAGO AND NICK. DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. NICK: Your admin sucks.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, but you could be a vampire hunter for all we'd know. He could be texting his mates saying, "I've got them all in the one place. Come on over and we'll have a vampire barbecue."</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. MWS DEACON, NICK AND VIAGO. VAMPIRE WITCH AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. MS DEACON, VIAGO AND STU. MORANA, JACKIE AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. BALL ATTENDEES: \[Laugh, murmur\]. DEACON: Well, he's not. He's not doing that. JULIAN \[OFF/ON\]: Well, we don't know that, do we? How do we know that? M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. MS DEACON, VIAGO AND STU. PAULINE IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. MORANA, JACKIE AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. DEACON: He's wearing a bowtie, look at him. VIAGO: Stu, tell them what you do. MS VIAGO, STU, DEACON AND NICK. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE \[OFF\]: Come on, Stu. Tell us what you do. Come on, Stu. MS PAULINE. JULIAN AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Tell them what you do, Stu. MWS DEACON, VIAGO, STU AND NICK. PAULINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. MORANA, JACKIE AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. STU: Ah, hi my name is Stu. Ah, I'm a... NICK: Don't fuck it up. PAULINE: I can't hear, Stu. DEACON: Ah, louder, louder. MS VIAGO, DEACON, STU AND NICK. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. STU: Ah, hi my name is Stu. Um, I work in IT. MWS JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. PAULINE: I can't hear. I can't hear. MWS NICK, STU, DEACON AND VIAGO. VAMPIRE WITCH AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM IN TO MS STU. NICK, DEACON, VIAGO AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. DEACON: Louder. VIAGO: Speak up, Stu. They can't hear you. They cannot hear you. STU: Hi, my name is Stu. I'm a software analyst. I work for a geographic information systems company. Ah, I work... MS DEACON AND STU. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. PAN TO MS DEACON, STU, VIAGO AND NICK. PAN TO MWS JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. PAULINE \[OFF\]: Sorry? What is it? STU: I work for a company that does, um, basically we take, like, business requirements from organizations and we, um, analyze those requirements, and then we build software to fit those requirements. MWS VIAGO, STU, NICK AND DEACON. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. PAULINE: He is a virgin. He is a virgin.</scene_description>
    <character>BALL ATTENDEES \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hiss\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VAMPIRE WITCH \[OFF/ON\]: I can smell a virgin at a thousand paces. MWS STU, NICK AND DEACON. VAMPIRE WITCH AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM IN. DEACON: Go on then. Go a thousand paces away and smell yourself. MS VAMPIRE WITCH. MORANA AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN TO MS DEACON AND VIAGO. STU IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. MS NICK, STU, DEACON AND VIAGO \[BACKS TO CAMERA\]. VAMPIRE WITCH AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VAMPIRE WITCH:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <character>BALL ATTENDEES \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hiss\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE \[OFF\]: I can't wait anymore. MWS JULIAN, PAULINE AND BALL ATTENDEES. MS DEACON, STU AND VIAGO. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. ZOOM IN. WS BALL ATTENDEES. ZOOM IN. M2S NICK AND VIAGO. VAMPIRE WITCH, MORANA AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV IN MASK.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>No!</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. ZOOM IN. WS BALL ATTENDEES. MS DEACON, NICK, VIAGO AND STU \[BACKS TO CAMERA\]. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. PAN AS VLADISLAV \[IN MASK\] WALKS FORWARD. VLADISLAV: There shall be no eating of the human. MS VIAGO AND VLADISLAV \[IN MASK\]. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN AS VLADISLAV WALKS. PAULINE \[OFF/ON\]: Who are you all of a sudden? MS VLADISLAV \[IN MASK\]. PAN TO M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VLADISLAV \[OFF\]: You have forgotten your former lover so quickly. MCU VLADISLAV \[IN MASK\]. STU AND VIAGO IN BG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN TO MWS JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. PAULINE: Ah, Georgie? M2S VLADISLAV \[IN MASK\] AND DEACON. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VLADISLAV: No, not Georgie. Like, five years after \[sighs\]. CU PAULINE. JULIAN IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. MWS VLADISLAV \[IN MASK\]. DEACON, STU, AND VIAGO IN BG. PAULINE IN FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. VLADISLAV TAKES OFF MASK. ZOOM IN. VLADISLAV: Wait a minute. Just one moment.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[WHISPERS\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Viago...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: Oh \[grunts\]. No, I've got it. That's got it. Takes away from... VIAGO: He's got it. M2S JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. ZOOM IN AND PAN.</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Gasps\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VLADISLAV. PAULINE IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME IN FG. STU, VIAGO AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VLADISLAV: Hello, Beast. MCU PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN. PAULINE: Hello, arsehole. VLADISLAV: Hey. Ah, don't call me arsehole. PAULINE: Oh, ah, don't call me Beast. MS VLADISLAV. PAULINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. DEACON, STU, VAMPIRE WITCH AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE: This is Vladislav. This is my ex- boyfriend. Do you know the one that fucked that witch? VLADISLAV: Just, ah, absolutely the same. O/S JULIAN AND PAULINE, VLADISLAV IN LEFT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VLADISLAV, DEACON, STU, NICK AND VIAGO. PAULINE IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh right.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VLADISLAV: All right. That's old business. That's personal business. PAULINE \[OFF\]: Yeah. O/S JULIAN AND PAULINE, VLADISLAV IN LEFT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. JULIAN: Nice to meet you, arsehole. PAULINE: This is my lover. VLADISLAV: You will not feast on the blood on the human known as Stu. No one! M2S VLADISLAV AND PAULINE. VIAGO, NICK JACKIE, JULIAN AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE: Listen, arsehole. This - this is human, and this is rules. And what is cameras doing here? One, then, another one. What is this? O/S JULIAN AND PAULINE, VLADISLAV IN LEFT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. M2S VLADISLAV AND PAULINE. VIAGO, NICK AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. O/S JULIAN AND PAULINE, VLADISLAV IN LEFT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM OUT AS VLADISLAV TURNS TO MWS VLADISLAV, JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VLADISLAV: Yes. VLADISLAV: We're making a documentary on... JULIAN: You'd be the - you'd be the sort of guy... this is a private secret society, mate. You don't go bringing your bloody cameras into everything. WS DEACON, STU, VIAGO, VLADISLAV, NICK, PAULINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\] AND JULIAN. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Exactly.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VLADISLAV AND PAULINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. VIAGO, NICK, MORANA, JACKIE AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VLADISLAV: You will not eat Stu, and you will not eat the camera guy. Maybe one camera guy.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Mate...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VLADISLAV AND JULIAN. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV, JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. JULIAN: I'm up to about bloody here with you at the moment. And all your mates behind there, whoever the hell they are. We're going to eat the human being, and there's nothing you can do about it, all right. Now back off, and let my missus get her way. MS VLADISLAV, JULIAN AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. MWS DEACON, STU, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM IN TO MCU STU. DEACON AND VIAGO IN EDGES OF FRAME. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE \[OFF\]: Yeah, just rip his... MS VLADISLAV AND PAULINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. NICK AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN TO O/S JULIAN AND PAULINE, VLADISLAV IN LEFT FG. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VLADISLAV: Oh, there's nothing I can do about it? MWS STU, VIAGO, VLADISLAV, NICK, PAULINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\] AND JULIAN. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VLADISLAV AND JULIAN STARTS TO FIGHT. JULIAN: That's right, mate. PAULINE: Okay, you - no, no no. You guys! VLADISLAV: Well, what about this? \[Grunts\]. PAN AS VLADISLAV AND JULIAN FIGHT. PAULINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. VIAGO, NICK AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. JULIAN: \[Grunts\]. Look, he's won. PAULINE: Rip his head off. WS BALL ATTENDEES. BALL ATTENDEES: \[Cheer, et cetera\] MS JULIAN AND VLADISLAV FIGHTING. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. MS JULIAN AND VLADISLAV FIGHTING. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. MS VLADISLAV MOVING. VIAGO, NICK IN BG. AND BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>Ooh!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO \[OFF\]: Vampire style. MS JULIAN AND VLADISLAV FIGHTING. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAN. PAULINE \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. MS BALL ATTENDEES. VIAGO \[OFF\]: Get him, Vladislav. MWS JULIAN AND VLADISLAV FIGHTING. VIAGO AND NICK IN BG. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. MS VLADISLAV. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. TILT UP AS VLADISLAV FLIES UP.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Hisses\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VLADISLAV \[IN MID-AIR\] JULIAN AND BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. JULIAN FLIES UP TO VLADISLAV. THEY START TO FIGHT. M2S VLADISLAV AND JULIAN FIGHTING IN MID-AIR.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV AND JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Scream\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VLADISLAV AND JULIAN FIGHTING IN MID-AIR. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. WS VLADISLAV AND JULIAN FIGHTING. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. MWS JACKIE AND BALL ATTENDEES.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV AND JULIAN \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Scream\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VLADISLAV AND JULIAN FIGHTING. BALL ATTENDEES IN FG AND BG. MS VLADISLAV AND JULIAN FIGHTING. PAN.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS PAN AS VLADISLAV LANDS ON TABLE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. MS VLADISLAV ON GROUND. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. JULIAN ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. JULIAN: \[Screams, grunts\]. VLADISLAV: \[Screams, grunts\]. MS JULIAN FLYING. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. PAULINE \[OFF\]: Rip his head off. WS VLADISLAV AND JULIAN FIGHTING. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM IN. VIAGO \[OFF\]: He's killing him. He's killing him. CU VLADISLAV ON GROUND. JULIAN \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] ON TOP OF HIM. MS VLADISLAV ON GROUND. JULIAN \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] ON TOP OF HIM. CU JULIAN. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. BALL ATTENDEES ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME IN FG. CU VLADISLAV ON GROUND. JULIAN \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] ON TOP OF HIM. LIFE FORCE IS SUCKED OUT OF VLADISLAV. TILT UP. VLADISLAV: It is forbidden for vampires \[grunts\] to kill vampires. JULIAN: \[Groans, grunts\]. TILT UP TO MCU JULIAN WITH STAKE THROUGH HIS CHEST. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM OUT AND PAN TO WS STU HOLDING END OF STAKE PIERCING JULIAN. PAULINE ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. JULIAN: \[Grunts\]. What the... fuck!</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Vlad!!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAULINE: Bloody hell. What - what...</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS JULIAN, STU AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. ZOOM IN TO CU STU. PAULINE: Are you okay, love? CU JULIAN. TILT DOWN AS HE FALLS TO GROUND.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <character>PAULINE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Get out!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>H/A MS JULIAN WITH STAKE ON GROUND. VLADISLAV AND STU \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. TILT UP TO MWS VLADISLAV AND STU. JULIAN IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. VLADISLAV: We should probably go, Stu.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VLADISLAV. STU IN BG. ZOOM OUT TO WS VLADISLAV, STU AND PAULINE. BALL ATTENDEES IN BG. JULIAN IN BOTTOM OF FRAME. VLADISLAV: It was great to see you, Pauline.</scene_description>
    <character>JULIAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <character>PAULINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Arsehole.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VLADISLAV RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TOWARDS DOOR. VIAGO IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>PAULINE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Bastards!</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, Stu.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. TOWN BELT - NIGHT. VAMPIRES MEET THE WEREWOLVES ON</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>TRANSFORMATION NIGHT MWS NICK, VIAGO, STU, VLADISLAV AND DEACON WALKING. TRACK BACK. VIAGO: He's a murderer \[laughs\]. VLADISLAV: That was great... how we both - we both together equally destroyed that guy \[laughs\].</scene_description>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>Yep, yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>DEACON: Yeah, yeah. But it was more Stu with the giant stick.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU \[V/O, ON\]: I hope this doesn't make it awkward for you and The Beast. MS DEACON, STU AND NICK. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV, DEACON, STU AND NICK. ZOOM IN AND PAN TO MCU VLADISLAV. DEACON AND STU IN BG. PAN TO MS DEACON, STU, NICK AND VIAGO. VLADISLAV: No, I think it's opened up new possibilities.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh no.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: \[Laughs\]. Here we go again. VIAGO: \[Sighs\]. Here we go again. WS STU, VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\], DEACON, VLADISLAV AND NICK. VIAGO, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND NICK: Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! Stu! WS DEACON, NICK, VIAGO, STU AND VLADISLAV WALKING. TRACK BACK. MS VLADISLAV. STU IN BG. PAN TO CU DEACON. STU IN BG. DEACON: Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Stop! Stop! Listen! Listen! \[Sniffs\]. Do you smell that? MS VIAGO \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. PAN TO M2S DEACON AND NICK. DEACON: \[Sniffs\]. This way. MCU DEACON. NICK AND VLADISLAV IN BG. PAN AS DEACON WALKS \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] MS VIAGO, NICK, VIAGO AND VLADISLAV WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. DEACON IN BG. TRACK IN. DEACON \[OFF\]: Werewolves \[sniffs\]. WEREWOLVES \[OFF\]: \[General chatter\]. WS ANTON, CLIFTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. DEACON WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TOWARDS THEM. TRACK IN. PAN TO WS WEREWOLVES. ANTON: Oh no. DEACON: Looked what the cat dragged in, huh.</scene_description>
    <character>ANTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <character>CLIFTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Piss off.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ANTON: Keep walking. Don't hassle us tonight. WS STU, VLADISLAV, DEACON, VIAGO, NICK AND ANTON. PAN TO WS ANTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. PAN TO MWS VIAGO, VLADISLAV, DEACON AND NICK. VLADISLAV: There has been no hassle here. ANTON: Well, let it stay that way. Keep chaining yourselves up. Guys, where's your tracksuit pants? CLIFTON \[OFF\]: It was, um, washing night. My missus couldn't wash them because there was too much blood in them. So... MWS CLIFTON. WEREWOLF IN BG. ZOOM IN TO MS CLIFTON. TILT DOWN TO CU CLIFTON'S LEGS. OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. ANTON \[OFF/ON\]: When your legs expand they grow into the tracksuit. MS ANTON. TILT DOWN TO CU ANTON'S LEG'S. TILT UP TO MS ANTON. PAN TO MWS WEREWOLVES. TILT DOWN TO LEGS. CLIFTON \[OFF\]: Oh. ANTON \[ON/OFF\]: Those jeans are gonna rip completely. You've lost all those trousers, guys. WEREWOLVES: Oh. ANTON: Declan, that tree is far too thin. Look at it, it's like a branch. You know how big you get when you transform. That's the wrong tree for you. MS ANTON. STU, DEACON AND VIAGO IN FG. OTHER WEREWOLVES IN BG. WS DECLAN BESIDE TREE. PAN AS HE WALKS. WEREWOLF \[OFF/ON\]: Anton, I've... M2S ANTON AND NATHAN. WEREWOLF CROSSES FG LEFT TO RIGHT. ANTON: Oh no. You've forgotten the combination. NATHAN: \[Breathes heavily\]. ANTON: Why did you get a combination lock? NATHAN: I lost my key last time. M2S ANTON AND NATHAN \[HEADS OUT OF FRAME\]. ANTON: Okay. Well it's probably four zeros. That's the factory setting, is it? Fuck off to a tree. MS ANTON. NATHAN EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME. CLIFTON \[OFF/ON\]: Hey. Werewolves not... swear- wolves. Werewolves not swear- wolves. But you... PAN TO MS CLIFTON. PAN TO MS ANTON. ANTON \[OFF\]: Yeah, I know. But, on transformation night it's all right. All right? I'm getting stressed out. CLIFTON \[OFF\]: I was just reminding you that you... PAN TO MS CLIFTON. PAN. ANTON \[OFF\]: Stop talking and chain yourself up, you dickhead! Honestly, we're transforming. MWS ANTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. PAN TO MS VLADISLAV \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. VLADISLAV: All right, we'll keep walking. ANTON: Yeah, keep walking. WS ANTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. VLADISLAV IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME. VLADISLAV: Well, we're walking. ANTON: By the way, I find that offensive. PAN TO M2S DION AND WEREWOLF. DION: Is that fur? PAN TO CU VLADISLAV. VIAGO AND NICK IN BG. ANTON \[OFF\]: Oh for crying out loud. Don't look at the fur everyone. Get back to your trees, okay?</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Murmur\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS ANTON. VLADISLAV, NICK AND DEACON IN LEFT OF FRAME. CLIFTON \[OFF/ON\]: That's disgusting, man. DECLAN: Anton! Anton! MWS CLIFTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES. PAN TO MWS ANTON. WEREWOLF IN BG. VLADISLAV, AND DEACON IN LEFT OF FRAME. VLADISLAV: You're wearing fur.</scene_description>
    <character>DION:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <character>ANTON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Declan!</dialogue>
    <character>DECLAN:</character>
    <dialogue>Anton!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CLIFTON: Yeah, but that's - it's not real fur.</scene_description>
    <character>ANTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh shit!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS VIAGO, VLADISLAV AND DEACON. PAN. WEREWOLVES: \[Growl, breathe heavily et cetera\].</scene_description>
    <character>ANTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Right.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAN TO CU MOON APPEARING FROM BEHIND CLOUD. ANTON \[OFF/ON\]: Honestly get out of here. Take your humans, that guy in the bowtie. He's gonna go first. Camera crew, get out of here. Quick! Take all your clothes off that you want to keep, everyone! Get that Army Surplus jacket off. You've only just bought that, Nathan. MS ANTON. WEREWOLF IN BG. STU AND VLADISLAV \[BACKS TO CAMERA\] IN FG. MS STU, NICK AND VLADISLAV. PAN. NICK: I'd better take Stu home. MS NICK. PAN TO M2S NICK AND STU. PAN TO MS OTHER WEREWOLVES STARTING TO TRANSFORM. PAN TO MS ANTON. WEREWOLVES IN BG. MS CLIFTON AND OTHER WEREWOLVES STARTING TO TRANSFORM. PAN, TILT DOWN AND ZOOM IN TO WEREWOLF ON GROUND.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growl\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAN TO WS VLADISLAV, VIAGO, NICK AND DEACON. WEREWOLF \[OFF\]: Get that camera out of my face! MS WEREWOLF STARTING TO TRANSFORM. VIAGO ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME TO CU. HE EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME TO CU WEREWOLF LUNGING FOR CAMERA. VIAGO \[OFF/ON\]: Guys, guys, guys. Let's go. Let's go. Come on!</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLF:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS ANTON TRANSFORMING. VAMPIRES \[OUT OF FOCUS\] CROSS FG RIGHT TO LEFT.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growl\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO \[OFF\]: Run, Stu! Run! No! PAN TO MS VIAGO RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. NICK AND DEACON RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] IN BG. PAN. MS WEREWOLF TRANSFORMING. VLADISLAV CROSSES BG RIGHT TO LEFT. WS STU, VIAGO, NICK AND DEACON RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN AND PAN. STU STARTS TO FALL. MS PAN VLADISLAV RUNNING. TREES IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growl\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS WEREWOLVES. PAN. H/A CU VLADISLAV \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] RUNNING.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Shit!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS WEREWOLF ENTERS FRAME FROM BEHIND TREE. PAN TO WS VIAGO RUNNING. WEREWOLF LUNGES FOR VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growl\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS DEACON FIGHTING WEREWOLF. DEACON: I got one! \[Grunts\]. H/A MS VLADISLAV FIGHTING WEREWOLF.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS WEREWOLF BITING VIAGO'S ARM. ZOOM IN. CU GROUND. TRACK IN AS \[CAMERAMAN\] RUNS.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CAMERAMAN \[OFF\]: \[Breathes heavily, grunts\].</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Howl\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WEREWOLF EMERGES FROM DARKNESS TO CU.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLF:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU GROUND. CAMERA IS DROPPED. CU CAMERAMAN ON GROUND. HE IS DRAGGED OUT RIGHT OF FRAME. DEAD CAMERA MAN FALLS ONTO GROUND TO CU. CAMERAMAN: \[Screams\]. My - my - My leg! My leg!</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLF:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU GROUND. PAN. WS NICK RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. PAN TO WS WEREWOLF.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLF:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>PAN TO MS NICK RUNNING. PAN.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu! Stu!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS TREES. PAN. TILT DOWN.</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu!</dialogue>
    <character>WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growl\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS WEREWOLF. STU FLIES THROUGH THE AIR AND LANDS ON GROUND. ZOOM IN AS WEREWOLVES ATTACK STU. PAN AND TILT UP TO MWS NICK IN MID-AIR. ZOOM OUT TO WS NICK \[IN MID-AIR\] AND WEREWOLVES WITH STU. PAN AS STU IS THROWN THROUGH AIR. TILT DOWN AND ZOOM IN AS STU LANDS OUT BOTTOM OF FRAME BESIDE WEREWOLF. PAN TO WS NICK IN MID-AIR, WEREWOLF HOLDING HIS LEG. PAN AND ZOOM IN TO MCU WEREWOLF. TILT DOWN TO STU CRAWLING ON GROUND. WEREWOLVES IN BG. STU: \[Screams, grunts\]. Ah ah! Get away from me! Ah! \[Screams, breathes heavily\]</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu!</dialogue>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Oi!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: Stu, are you all right? NICK: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Stu!</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU \[OFF\]: \[Breathes heavily\]. NICK: Fuck off, arsehole! \[Spits\].</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Fuck off!</dialogue>
    <character>WEREWOLF:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Growls\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU \[OFF/ON\]: \[Breathes heavily\]. NICK \[OFF/ON\]: Fuck off! Get off, dick! WS NICK IN MID-AIR, WEREWOLF HOLDING HIS LEG. WEREWOLVES: \[Growl, howl\].</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Oi!!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS NICK IN MID-AIR, WEREWOLVES HOLDING HIS LEGS.</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Screams\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>NICK: \[Grunts\]. Arseholes. MWS WEREWOLVES ATTACKING STU. MWS WEREWOLVES ATTACKING STU. ZOOM IN TO MS STU ON GROUND. PAN TO WS NICK IN MID-AIR, WEREWOLVES HOLDING HIS LEGS. DEACON FLIES IN LEFT OF FRAME AND ATTACKS WEREWOLVES. THEY FALL OUT BOTTOM OF FRAME. ZOOM IN TO M2S DEACON AND NICK IN MID-AIR. PAN AND TILT DOWN TO MWS WEREWOLVES ATTACKING STU. ZOOM IN TO MS STU ON GROUND. NICK \[OFF\]: No, no, no, no. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. DEACON \[OFF/ON\]: \[Growls\]. Stupid werewolves. Look away, Nick. Don't look at the blood. WEREWOLVES: \[Growl, howl FADES OUT\]. NICK: No, Stu! Stu! NICK \[OFF\]: He was - oh. He was a really good dude! Leave him alone! DEACON \[OFF\]: It's too late for him. Don't look at the blood, Nick. NICK \[OFF\]: Stu! MS WEREWOLVES. FADE TO BLACK. BLACK.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. TOWN BELT - NIGHT. DEACON CONSOLES NICK</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS TREES. PAN AND TILT TO MS DEACON \[BACK TO CAMERA\]. MCU DEACON. DEACON: There he is. DEACON: He's probably still a little upset, having seen his best friend disembowelled by werewolves. MWS DEACON WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] TOWARDS NICK IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Nick... I found you.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS DEACON SITTING BESIDE NICK ON GROUND. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Whoa \[sniffs\].</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>That was pretty full on, eh? \[Sighs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>But this is what happens when you're a vampire. You have to watch everyone die.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Your mother and father... all your friends. Sometimes brutal.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S NICK AND DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Like slipping and falling onto a giant spike, or falling asleep in autumn pile of leaves, and having some of them block your windpipe.</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sniffs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Breathes heavily, sniffs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Or making the simple mistake of fashioning a mask out of crackers, and being attacked by ducks, geese... swans. Or simply dying of old age.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sniffs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU NICK. CU DEACON. PAN TO M2S NICK AND DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>But even old age is brutal.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU NICK.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Watching your friends grew old. They can't piss. And they say stupid things, and their brains go, and they can't remember anything.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sniffs\].</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. RITA ANGUS RETIREMENT VILLAGE - NIGHT. VIAGO WATCHES</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>KATHERINE AGAIN L/A WS KATHERINE IN WINDOW. DEACON \[V/O\]: And then one day, they can't even remember who you are. WS VIAGO ON STREET. MWS KATHERINE IN WINDOW. DEACON \[V/O\]: And you wish they were dead.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. TOWN BELT - NIGHT. DEACON CONSOLES NICK - CONTINUED</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CU DEACON. PAN TO CU NICK. DEACON: And then they do die. NICK: \[Breathes heavily\].</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>No...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S NICK AND DEACON. ZOOM IN TO CU DEACON. DEACON: If I know Stu... this was probably the way he wanted to go. Disembowelled by werewolves. Blood and guts splayed onto the trees. His face torn to shreds. M2S NICK AND DEACON. CU DEACON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sighs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU NICK. WS NICK AND DEACON SEATED ON GRASS. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>I hope I made you feel better.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>BLACK.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. TOWN BELT - NIGHT. POLICE AND AMBULANCE ATTEND TO STU</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CU AMBULANCE. TILT DOWN AS AMBULANCE OFFICER \[BACK TO CAMERA\] OPENS DOOR.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Ah, well from what we can see, and what we can gather, ah, it looks like there's been a bit of a dog attack. That's really what happens when you get, you know, dangerous dogs out on the streets, not being looked after.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS AMBULANCE OFFICER \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] PULLING STRETCHER FROM AMBULANCE. TILT DOWN. MWS AMBULANCE OFFICER, POLICEWOMAN AND POLICEMAN WALKING. WS AMBULANCE OFFICER, POLICEWOMAN AND POLICEMAN WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN AS THEY WALK TO STU LYING ON GRASS.</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>This is not...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN: This is not good. POLICEWOMAN \[ON/OFF\]: No, not good at all. No certainly not. MWS POLICEWOMAN, POLICEMAN AND AMBULANCE OFFICERS BESIDE STU LYING ON GROUND. ZOOM IN TO H/A MS STU ON GROUND. POLICEMAN \[V/O\]: There's nicer ways to go than being torn about by, ah, by what looks like a pack of dogs. More than - more than just one. M2S POLICEWOMAN AND POLICEMAN. H/A MS AMBULANCE OFFICER \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] STARTING TO PUT STU ON STRETCHER. POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]: That's, ah - yeah, I'd say so. POLICEWOMAN \[V/O\]: These attacks are becoming more and more frequent. They're happening on a monthly basis, and it's just - it's no good for anybody, okay? Especially not the dogs, certainly not the community. MCU POLICEWOMAN. AMBULANCE IN BG. POLICEMAN \[OFF/ON\]: Yeah, O'Leary. I got the bastard. One of them here, eh? MS POLICEWOMAN. AMBULANCE OFFICERS WITH STRETCHER IN BG. POLICEMAN ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME WITH DOG. ZOOM OUT TO MWS. POLICEWOMAN: Okay. Oh. Geez. And that's what I'm talking about. Look at it. End of the day this dog is going to be - have to be put down. What a shame. MS DOG AND POLICEMAN. PAN AND TILT UP TO MS POLICEWOMAN. CU DOG. POLICEMAN \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] IN BG. WS POLICEMAN AND DOG BESIDE STU ON STRETCHER. FADE TO BLACK.: POLICEMAN: Look what you did. Eh? Now, he's got the scent again, hasn't he? He wants to go again. He's not finished. POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]: No, you - yeah, yeah. BLACK.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. SAD ABOUT STU</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CU SUNRISE ON COMPUTER SCREEN. MWS DEACON SEATED ON COUCH LOOKING AT COMPUTER. ZOOM IN.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. BAR - NIGHT. SAD ABOUT STU</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS NICK SEATED AT BAR. BARMAN IN BG.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. SAD ABOUT STU</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>PAN TO MS \[THROUGH DOORWAY\] VLADISLAV IN TORTURE CHAMBER. PAN TO WEREWOLF \[CHAINED\]. CU DISHES.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. BEACH - NIGHT. FAREWELL STU</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO, NICK, DEACON AND VLADISLAV. PAN AS NICK THROWS SCARF INTO WATER.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>They say that vampires' hearts are cold and dead. Definitely dead...</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Bye Stu.</dialogue>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>He would've loved this scarf.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>It's a lovely loose knit.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. VIAGO SAVES DEACON FROM BEING SIZZLED TO</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>A CRISP MWS VIAGO WALKING. PAN.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>...but, I don't know, I think I still feel things inside it.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] DOWN HALLWAY. TRACK IN. WS VIAGO CLOSING CURTAINS. PAN AS HE RUNS TO DEACON ASLEEP AT COMPUTER TO MWS.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Deacon...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: Deacon... Deacon, wakey wakey. Hey...</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Viago...</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: You were asleep in here with the curtains open. It's nearly morning. You want to get sizzled to a crisp?</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS VIAGO HELPING DEACON INTO HIS ROOM. VIAGO CLOSES DOOR TO MCU. VIAGO EXITS RIGHT OF FRAME.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>What?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO: You know you've got to think a little bit about these things. DEACON: Okay. Sorry Viago. VIAGO: No, it's okay. DEACON: Night, night. DEACON: Night, night. Okay. BLACK.: FADE IN CU PHOTOGRAPH OF VLADISLAV, VIAGO, DEACON, PAULINE, NICK AND STU. ZOOM IN. FADE TO BLACK. BLACK.: FADE IN: TITLE Hey Guys, it's Nick the Vampire here. FADE IN: TITLE Just a heads-up, I've got quite a big surprise... FADE IN: TITLE It's gonna blow everyone's mind, I think. ANSWERPHONE: ...received at 4:20 AM. NICK \[V/O\]: Hey guys, it's, ah, it's Nick the Vampire here. Um, ah, just a heads- up, I've got, um, quite a big surprise. Ah, yeah. It's - it's gonna blow everyone's mind, I think.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. STU THE WEREWOLF VISITS</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MCU DEACON WALKING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN AS HE WALKS TO DOOR. HE OPENS IT TO O/S STU AND NICK, DEACON IN LEFT FG. NICK: Ah!</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU: Hey Deacon.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Stu!</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>How's it?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>O/S STU AND NICK, DEACON IN LEFT FG. DEACON EMBRACES STU.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU: Good to see you. MWS DEACON, STU AND NICK IN DOORWAY. STU AND NICK WALK THROUGH DOORWAY. ZOOM IN TO M2S NICK AND STU. DEACON ENTERS RIGHT OF FRAME. ZOOM OUT. NICK: Look at his face. DEACON: I saw them tear you to shreds. NICK: Look, he looks like Seal. STU: Ah, they didn't kill me. DEACON: That looks cool. STU: Thank you. Thank you.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS DEACON, NICK AND STU. ANTON, CLIFTON AND WEREWOLVES ENTER FRAME \[THROUGH DOORWAY\]. ZOOM IN TO MS DEACON AND ANTON. CLIFTON AND WEREWOLF IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Meet some of our friends.</dialogue>
    <character>STU:</character>
    <dialogue>You've, sort of...</dialogue>
    <character>NICK:</character>
    <dialogue>Anton...</dialogue>
    <character>ANTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Deacon. Hi, Anton.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Anton.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS ANTON, CLIFTON AND WEREWOLVES. DEACON IN LEFT FG. PAN TO MS STU. WEREWOLVES IN BG.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sniffs\].</dialogue>
    <character>STU \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I must've blacked out. Um, and then, I remember an ambulance.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU INTERVIEW MCU STU.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>EXT. TOWN BELT - NIGHT. POLICE AND AMBULANCE ATTEND TO STU -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED WS STU CONVULSING ON STRETCHER. POLICEMAN AND AMBULANCE OFFICER BESIDE HIM. POLICEWOMAN RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\] IN FG. TRACK IN TO MS STU CONVULSING ON STRETCHER. STU CLIMBS OFF STRETCHER. POLICEMAN: He's going into shock, O'Leary! POLICEWOMAN: Yeah, yeah. I'm on it. STU: \[Growls et cetera\].</scene_description>
    <character>POLICEMAN:</character>
    <dialogue>O'Leary!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>POLICEWOMAN: Yeah, coming. POLICEWOMAN \[OFF\]: Okay. Just calm down, mate. POLICEMAN: Calm down. Grab his legs! POLICEWOMAN \[off\]: Yeah, yeah. Just hang on a sec. MS POLICEWOMAN AND POLICEMAN BESIDE AMBULANCE, STU IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. PAN AS STU RUNS WS STU RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. ZOOM IN. POLICEMAN \[OFF\]: Looks like rabies, doesn't it? WS STU RUNNING \[AWAY FROM CAMERA\]. TRACK IN. STU \[V/O, ON\]: And I don't know how long after that it was, but I, like, woke up and it was daytime. MCU STU. WHITE FLASH. REENACTMENT FADE IN L/A WS TREES. PAN AROUND. DISSOLVE. FADE IN CU STU'S FEET. TRACK IN TO H/A CU STU LYING ON GROUND \[BLACK AND WHITE\]. TITLE \[SUPERED\]: Re-enactment</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>And I couldn't find my clothes.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS STU ON GROUND. TRACK TO CU WEREWOLF IN LEFT EDGE OF FRAME IN FG. \[BLACK AND WHITE\].</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Those werewolf guys, um, eventually found me. And they had some - they, like, lent me some pants.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>L/A MWS ANTON, CLIFTON AND WEREWOLVES. ANTON HOLDS OUT PANTS. \[BLACK AND WHITE\]. MS STU. ZOOM IN. \[BLACK AND WHITE\]. FADE TO WHITE.</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>So, yeah, those guys have been supporting me, ah, because I was - was quite confused.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WHITE.:</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. THE VAMPIRES BOND WITH THE WEREWOLVES</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>MCU DEACON. STU \[OFF/ON\]: Yeah, these are the guys who, um, turned me into a werewolf.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sniffs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS DEACON AND STU. CLIFTON \[OFF\]: Did you knit your own jersey? MWS CLIFTON AND WEREWOLVES. PAN TO MWS WEREWOLF, DEACON AND STU.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes.</dialogue>
    <character>CLIFTON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh yeah.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>I knit.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ANTON \[OFF/ON\]: It's, ah, is that the moon or...? PAN TO MWS DEACON, STU AND ANTON.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ANTON: Hopefully we won't, you know \[growls, laughs\]. MS DEACON. STU IN RIGHT EDGE OF FRAME. PAN TO M2S STU AND ANTON. PAN TO MWS WEREWOLVES.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLVES \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laugh\].</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS ANTON, WEREWOLVES, DEACON, STU, AND NICK WALKING. PAN AROUND AS THEY WALK THROUGH DOORWAY.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLF:</character>
    <dialogue>Oh, this is a nice place.</dialogue>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Please don't, ah, don't lick anything, or pee on anything.</dialogue>
    <character>WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laugh\] Yes et cetera.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>We were worried at first, you know. We thought, oh, they're just going to urinate on everything. But, ah, they're actually really polite, and pretty clean. There was obviously the werewolf smell, which permeated the entire house for the first half an hour. But we opened some windows, and got rid of that.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>VIAGO INTERVIEW MCU VIAGO. MS DEACON, STU AND CLIFTON. WEREWOLVES IN FG. PAN.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON AND WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Toast, cheer\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO. MWS VLADISLAV AND VIAGO. CLIFTON AND WEREWOLF SEATED ON COUCH. MCU STU. VLADISLAV HANGING OUT WINDOW. MCU VIAGO.</scene_description>
    <character>ANTON \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>When Stu first suggested the idea, I thought, no way, you know, walking into the vampire's den. That's ludicrous.</dialogue>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. THE VAMPIRES BOND WITH THE WEREWOLVES -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED M2S VIAGO AND VLADISLAV. STU \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. ZOOM OUT TO MWS VIAGO AND ANTON SHAKING HANDS. VLADISLAV, AND NICK IN BG. STU \[BACK TO CAMERA\] IN FG. WS VIAGO, ANTON, DEACON AND WEREWOLVES. PAN AS ANTON AND VLADISLAV SHAKE HANDS. MCU ANTON. WEREWOLVES IN FG. PAN TO MS CLIFTON AND STU. WEREWOLF IN FG.</scene_description>
    <character>WEREWOLF:</character>
    <dialogue>That's my hand.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>TILT UP TO MWS DEACON, STU, CLIFTON, NICK AND WEREWOLVES.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON AND WEREWOLVES:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Cheer, et cetera\].</dialogue>
    <character>ANTON \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>But I thought, well we'll give it a shot, you know. I'm the alpha male, so I made the call.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ANTON INTERVIEW M2S ANTON AND STU.</scene_description>
  </scene>
  <scene>
    <stage_direction>INT. HOUSE - NIGHT. THE VAMPIRES BOND WITH THE WEREWOLVES -</stage_direction>
    <scene_description>CONTINUED MWS DEACON AND ANTON. ZOOM IN TO M2S. ANTON: I'm the alpha male.</scene_description>
    <character>DEACON:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes.</dialogue>
    <character>ANTON:</character>
    <dialogue>So, generally all the other guys follow me.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>WS VIAGO, ANTON, DEACON, CLIFTON AND WEREWOLVES. PAN TO MWS STU, VLADISLAV AND WEREWOLVES.</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>To Stu!</dialogue>
    <character>ALL:</character>
    <dialogue>To Stu!</dialogue>
    <scene_description>STU: Thanks, guys. MCU STU. PAN TO MCU KATHERINE. KATHERINE \[OFF/ON\]: What have you done to your face?</scene_description>
    <character>STU \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I got attacked by some werewolves.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU STU.</scene_description>
    <character>KATHERINE \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Ooh. I met a werewolf. Seemed a very nice person.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU KATHERINE. VIAGO and KATHERINE INTERVIEW MWS KATHERINE AND VIAGO SEATED.</scene_description>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>So Katherine is a vampire now.</dialogue>
    <character>KATHERINE:</character>
    <dialogue>Yes.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, we decided to get together.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>We just thought, to hell with it, you know. What have we got to lose?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MCU VIAGO. HE EXITS LEFT OF FRAME. PAN TO L/A WS VIAGO AND KATHERINE THROUGH WINDOWS. VIAGO WALKS TO KATHERINE.</scene_description>
    <character>KATHERINE \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I was just sitting doing nothing. And he came floating in, and over to me, and I recognized him. It was wonderful \[laughs\]. Yeah, oh yeah \[laughs\]. That's right \[laughs\].</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>That's right. I bit you on the neck \[laughs\]. Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS KATHERINE AND VIAGO SEATED. L/A WS \[THROUGH WINDOW\] VIAGO BITING KATHERINE'S NECK. KATHERINE \[V/O, ON\]: And I don't mind being a vampire. I'm enjoying it. MWS KATHERINE AND VIAGO SEATED. M2S VIAGO AND KATHERINE SEATED AT TABLE. CU VIAGO'S AND KATHERINE'S FEET DANCING. VIAGO \[V/O, ON\]: Some people freak out a bit about the age difference. Ah, they think, what's this 96-year-old lady doing with a guy four times her age? And, you know, I don't care. They could... MWS VIAGO AND KATHERINE DANCING. WEREWOLF IN RIGHT FG. MWS KATHERINE AND VIAGO SEATED. KATHERINE: It doesn't make any difference. VIAGO \[ON/OFF\]: No. They can call me 'cradle- snatcher'. Who cares? I decided to bite her, and we're gonna be together forever. MCU KATHERINE. MCU VIAGO. PAN TO MCU KATHERINE.</scene_description>
    <character>KATHERINE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Wonderful.</dialogue>
    <character>VIAGO:</character>
    <dialogue>Ja.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MWS KATHERINE AND VIAGO SEATED. BLACK.: FADE IN CU PAINTING OF VLADISLAV. ZOOM IN. CU SHOE IN HALLWAY. VLADISLAV \[V/O, ON\]: Pauline and I are tentatively back together. But it's not long before you remember why it was you broke up in the first place. MS PAULINE AND VLADISLAV \[HEAD OUT OF FRAME\] FIGHTING ON WALL. MS PAULINE AND VLADISLAV FIGHTING ON WALL. VLADISLAV AND PAULINE: \[Shout, grunt et cetera\]. MS VLADISLAV. MS PAULINE AND VLADISLAV FIGHTING ON WALL. PAN TO CU WALL. TILT DOWN TO CU SHOE. FADE TO BLACK. TITLE: Beast! TITLE: Arsehole!</scene_description>
    <character>VLADISLAV:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\]. \[In made up language\]: Beast \[grunts\].</dialogue>
    <character>PAULINE:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Grunts\]. \[In made up language\]: Arsehole \[grunts\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>BLACK.: FADE IN CU JACKIE'S HUSBAND WRITING IN NOTEBOOK. TILT UP TO CU JACKIE'S HUSBAND.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE \[OFF/ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Start in our bedroom. I need that</dialogue>
    <scene_description>totally boarded up or blacked out somehow. M2S JACKIE AND JACKIE'S HUSBAND SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE'S HUSBAND:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Sniffs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS JACKIE.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>My husband is my familiar. So there's been a dynamic shift there.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S JACKIE AND JACKIE'S HUSBAND SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>You could buy a bedazzler. So write that down.</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>Because - that's b-e-d...</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE'S HUSBAND:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE \[V/O, ON\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I feel like I'm who I'm really meant to be now \[laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>MS JACKIE.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE \[V/O\]:</character>
    <dialogue>I love you.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CU JACKIE'S HUSBAND. PAN TO CU JACKIE.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE'S HUSBAND:</character>
    <dialogue>Mmm. I love you too.</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE \[OFF\]:</character>
    <dialogue>Great.</dialogue>
    <character>JACKIE:</character>
    <dialogue>But I am your master, okay?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>M2S JACKIE AND JACKIE'S HUSBAND SEATED AT TABLE.</scene_description>
    <character>JACKIE'S HUSBAND:</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah.</dialogue>
    <scene_description>BLACK.:</scene_description>
    <character>ANTON: (V.O.)</character>
    <dialogue>Yeah, these guys have to laugh at my jokes. Right, guys?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>FADE IN WS ANTON, STU, CLIFTON AND WEREWOLVES. PAN. WEREWOLVES: Yeah \[laugh et cetera\]. NATHAN: \[Laughs\]. That is a good one, man. ANTON: I always - I always look round and make sure they're all laughing. Like, if I see one of them is not quite laughing, I'll go, "Hey. Are you laughing?" And then often I'll test you, eh? What were you laughing at? Clifton? CLIFTON: Yes \[laughs\]. Yeah \[laughs\]. Yeah.</scene_description>
    <character>CLIFTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Eh?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ANTON: What are you laughing at now?</scene_description>
    <character>CLIFTON:</character>
    <dialogue>Just then?</dialogue>
    <scene_description>ANTON: Yeah, but what?</scene_description>
    <character>DECLAN:</character>
    <dialogue>\[Laughs\].</dialogue>
    <scene_description>CLIFTON: I don't know, because you - you... ANTON: Oh, test failed \[laughs\]. Test failed. Yeah, eh, eh? WEREWOLVES: \[Laugh\]. CLIFTON: \[Laughs\]. ANTON: Laughing now. What are you laughing at now though? What are you laughing at now though? CLIFTON: Yeah I \[laughs\]. I don't know because I - I felt uncom... ANTON: Oh, another failure \[laughs\]. CLIFTON: \[Laughs\]. WEREWOLVES: \[Laugh\]. ANTON: What are you laughing at, Stu? STU: Oh, I was laughing with the group. ANTON: Yep. That's good. That's good. Yeah, he's in - see. Yeah. Just pay attention. Pay attention. WEREWOLVES: Yeah \[general agreeing\]. CLIFTON: (OFF) Yeah. Really? I saw him... STU: (Laugh with the group.) CLIFTON: (Laugh with the group.) BLACK.: FADE IN CU DEACON. VLADISLAV AND VIAGO \[OUT OF FOCUS\] IN BG. DEACON: You will not remember the last hour and a half of what you have just see. You will forget the contents of this movie.</scene_description>
  </scene>
</script>

Summary: A documentary crew follows four vampire housemates—Viago, Vladislav, Deacon, and Petyr—who share a flat in the Wellington suburb of Te Aro. All of the vampires possess supernatural powers, including levitation and the ability to transform into animals. Viago is a 379-year-old dandy who originally traveled to New Zealand in the 1910s in search of Katherine, the love of his life; Vladislav is an 862-year-old known as "Vladislav the Poker", who is haunted by memories of his nemesis "the Beast"; and Deacon is a 183-year-old former peddler and the "young rebel" of the group who was turned into a vampire by Petyr—a reclusive, 8,000-year-old vampire who behaves like a feral animal and resembles Count Orlok. Each night, Viago, Vladislav, and Deacon take the bus into town and prowl the streets of Wellington for people to kill. Deacon's human familiar, Jackie, runs errands for the vampires and cleans up the gore left behind by their feeding. A married mother, Jackie hopes to attain immortality, but is frustrated that Deacon will not turn her into a vampire as promised. Deacon requests that Jackie bring virgins to the flat so that the vampires can feed on them. She lures a woman who insulted her in primary school and her ex-boyfriend Nick to the flat. Though neither are actually virgins, the woman is killed, and Nick is chased throughout the flat and manages to get outside, only to be caught by Petyr, who turns him into a vampire. Two months later, the vampires accept Nick into their group and bond with his human friend Stu, a computer analyst who introduces them to modern technology. Viago uses the Internet to find Katherine, who is now a 96-year-old widow living in a rest home in Wellington, and also briefly reconnects with his old servant Philip. Despite being able to get his new friends into popular bars and clubs, Nick struggles to adapt to life as a vampire. Nick is also held in contempt by Deacon, who resents Nick's newfound popularity and his careless revealing of his vampirism to strangers he meets. One of these strangers, a vampire hunter, breaks into the flat basement during the day and kills Petyr by exposing him to sunlight. The vampires are furious when they discover Nick has indirectly caused Petyr's death, and Deacon tries to kill Nick before being interrupted by a police welfare check, but Viago hypnotizes them into not noticing anything out of the ordinary. Once the police leave, Nick is banished from the flat by the remaining vampires, though Stu is permitted to come as he pleases. Several months later, the vampires receive an invitation to the annual Unholy Masquerade, hosted for the local undead population of vampires, zombies, and witches. Vladislav refuses to attend after learning that "the Beast" will be the guest of honor. When Viago and Deacon arrive at the ball, they find in attendance Nick, Stu and Jackie, the latter of whom has been turned into a vampire by Nick. "The Beast" is revealed to be Vladislav's ex-girlfriend Pauline, and when Stu and the camera crew are discovered to be living humans, the party guests threaten to kill and feed on them. Vladislav arrives and fights with Pauline's new boyfriend Julian. Stu impales Julian on a flagpole, and the vampires and camera crew escape the ball with him, only to encounter a rival pack of werewolves who transform under the full moon. Stu and one of the cameramen are mauled. Believing Stu to be dead, the vampires run away and grieve for him. After an indeterminate amount of time, Nick returns to the flat with Stu, who reveals he has survived the attack and transformed into a werewolf. With Stu's urging, the pack visits the vampires along with Stu, and Nick's banishment is rescinded as well. Though momentarily apprehensive, Deacon invites the werewolf pack inside. Viago also reconnects and rekindles his romance with Katherine, whom he turns into a vampire. Scenes during the credits reveal that Vladislav has gotten back together with Pauline, repeating his cycle of self-inflicted torture over his relationship with her; and Jackie's husband is now serving as her familiar. A post-credits scene shows Deacon attempting to hypnotize the audience to forget the events of the film.